Play Your­self

All work and no play makes you dull. So when your ca­reer eats into your sex life, how do you put the brakes on?

CLEO (Malaysia) - - NEWS - David Smiedt has been CLEO’s male con­fi­dant f or over 10 years, be­cause he tell sit like it is.

Of­fice af­fairs and Pe­riod Sex. Um...

Q Work has been eat­ing up all my time lately and adding to my stress. I find it hard to tune out so it’ s mak­ing it re­ally hard to en­joy sex. Help!

A: Does t he word “whiskey ” mean any­thing to you? Okay, jokes aside, even ifit’ s not booze t hat will help you ease up, the key here lies in find­ing a tran­si­tional state be­tween your work and stressed state of mind, and com­ing home to your boo. Whether it’s just straight up din­ner, watch­ing 50Shades to­gether or soak­ing in a bath, try to make it a phone-free zone. No mes­sages, no emails, no work talk. To re­ally mix things up, add some nov­elty to the sex by chang­ing up t he po­si­tion , lo­ca­tion, toys ... Any­thing, re­ally, to help with the idea that you’ re just go­ing through t he mo­tions.

Q Ever since I scored my dream job, I’ ve been more dom­i­nant in the bed­room and my part­ner doesn’t seem to en­joy it. Is he over-re act­ing?

A: Short an­swer, yes , we’re with you on t he over­re­act­ing score. Firstly, con­grat­u­la­tions on scor­ing your dream j ob. Se­condly, con­grat­u­la­tions that this suc­cess has boosted your con­fi­dence in the bed­room, be­cause con­fi­dence and dom­i­nance are not that dif­fer­ent —un­less of course it’s the safe word type of dom­i­nance( even so, this is not a ter­ri­ble thing, ei­ther ). That’ s some­thing you should own, be­cause there are few things more al­lur­ing than a woman find­ing her erotic power. It’ s up to him to sit back and en­joy the ride( per­haps quite lit­er­ally ).

QI have a not- so - se­cret fan­tasy about do­ing itin the work­place. I ’m keen on one of the man­agers, and he’s seen my sig­nals , but noth­ing has hap­pened yet. Should I go ahead?

A: Sure, if you want to have a less-than-glow­ing ref­er­ence and end­ing up with your ca­reer in the toi­let, go ahead. As thrilling as itis( the thought that it’s risky and dan­ger­ous maybe the fac­tor ), you’re jeop­ar­dis­ing some­thing t hat can never be re­paired if you’ re caught panties down. And that’ if’ could be­come a ’ when’ quicker than you think. Most work­place sin 2017 have CCTV sin places you’d hardly think. We’ re not say­ing you can’t shag a col­league. Go f or it. Just maybe take the ac­tion else­where. A park , or you know, your place.

Q Can you help t alk me un­der­stand the stigma of Pe­riod Sex? I of ten do i t but my girl­friends seem to cringe i n hor­ror.

A: If there was any­thing like un­charted ter­ri­tory, Pe­riod Sex is up there with the Mars mis­sion and the lost is­lands of the In­done­sian Ar­chi­pel­ago: Some­thing so far-flung and dis­missed as im­pass­able, or just plain un­in­hab­it­able. A no-go zone. For some peo­ple, that is. For oth­ers like you, it’s the com­plete norm and“that time of the month” doesn’t throw sex life into a week-long hia­tus. Plus, long gone are the mid-18th cen­tury days where women on their pe­ri­ods are con­sid­ered “un­clean”. There’s no rea­son to f eel un­cer­tain or self-con­scious talk­ing about Pe­riod Sex. It hap­pens, peo­ple should know it, and re­ally, all it takes it just lay­ing a towel down( or hop­ping into the shower), and hav­ing an open con­ver­sa­tion with your part­ner. He won’t mind it, as you know. Be­cause why should you com­pro­mise your or­gasms?

When does the ride start?

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