What To Do When You’re Done With Sex

Dry spells get a pretty bad rap. And as the gen who’s hav­ing the least sex, what ’s the big deal ac­tu­ally? Own your sex­ual droughts, once and for all .

CLEO (Malaysia) - - CLEO -

You know, be­cause not every night is Ladies’ Night, ya dig?

Con fess ion: A few years ago this# Team CLEO staff er woke up and de­cided togo on a sex sab­bat­i­cal. It was on the back of the pro­longed, un­healthy pe­riod of sleep­ing with an ex, where she thought he’d be so ex­cited to Net­flix and chill t hat he’d want to hang out with t he rest of her again, too. So on one par­tic­u­lar morn­ing, she cut all ties with Mr F *** boy and took mat­ters into her own hands. What she didn’t pre­dict was two years later she’d still be deal­ing with mat­ters in her own hands — lit­er­ally.

But in those two sex­less years she didn’t re-vir­gin i se or grow cob­webs down there, as you’d imag­ine would hap­pen .( But she did think a lot about Zac Efron.) She felt em pow­ered. Of course there was al­ways the odd dark day. But 90 per­cent of the time in­stead of just sur­viv­ing the sex drought, she thrived. Here is Gemma’s story.

SEX SAB­BAT­I­CAL SMARTS # 1 Peo­ple aren’t hav­ing as much sex as you think

“One even­ing, my friend Ca th an­nounced, ‘Ahhh, I ’m ex­hausted. I had sex five times this morn­ing .’ Yes, five. Not a ty po for‘ one ’. I was in the early months of dat­ing some­one brand new and we’d prob­a­bly done it five times in to­tal; Cath was clearly much, much bet­ter at sex than me. It was only af­ter they broke up that she con­fessed that t he sex was ac­tu­ally ter­ri­ble. And those five times? A ne­ces­sity, due to his in­abil­ity to last very long, nudge nudge, wink wink. See, it’ s easy tog eta mis­lead­ing pic­ture of what some­one’s up to.”

SEX SAB­BAT­I­CAL SMARTS # 2 Skip­ping sex- er­cise won’t stuff up your body goals

“Sex as a le­git form of ex­er­cise? In the­ory, yes, but it de­pends how long you goat it. A study pub­lished in med­i­cal jour­nal PLOS One re­cruited 21 cou­ples in their twen­ties to wear data-mon­i­tor­ing arm­bands dur­ing sex and a tread­mill work­out. For women, get­ting it on burned three calo­ries each minute and, when par­tic­i­pants em­barked upon a 25- minute ses­sion, gave off the equiv­a­lent en­ergy ex­pen­di­ture of walk­ing up hill. Not bad, right? It’s less im­pres­sive, how­ever, if you con­sider t he av­er­age sex­ual en­counter on lasts for 5.5 to 7.5 mins. Par­tic­i­pants who stuck to the tread­mill, how­ever, burnt more than dou­ble the calo­ries. Now, that kind of ex­er­cise can go all day and night.”

SEX SAB­BAT­I­CAL SMARTS # 3 You won’t end up red-faced in the emer­gency depart­ment

“True story: Dur­ing fore play, one of my friends got her braces stuck on her man, down there. An­other, in the throes of sex by the beach, eroded part of her boyfriend’ s pe­nis when some sand travel led where it shouldn’t. Ina survey of pe­nile frac­tures( a.k.a where it breaks) the most risky cause was woman-on-top. Be­cause we con­trol t he move­ment, should his pe­nis sud­denly slip out or bend the wrong way, there' s lit­tle he can do un­til—crack( yep, it makes that sound )— So ... hooray for the sex drought, right ?”

In those two sex­less years she didn’t re­vir­ginise or grow cob­webs ... as you’d imag­ine would hap­pen.

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