rule no. 863: You look 12 percent more important wearing a hands-free headset.
no. 864: But only when standing.
no. 865: You do not have to respond to any e-mail sent after the end of work hours until the next workday morning because you are a human being with a soul.
no. 866: Always accept the former intern’s Linkedin request—especially from the one with the serial-killer haircut. (She can’t hurt you there.)
no. 867: No, instant-messaging does not look like working.
no. 868: But e-mailing friends and dates from your work account does.
no. 869: An open-office floor plan is a revolutionary way to ensure that employees wear headphones and work silently all day.