I’m go­ing on a va­ca­tion with this girl I just met. We agreed to spend time with each other un­til she re­turns home that’s in a dif­fer­ent coun­try. What do I do if I catch feel­ings?

Men's Health (Malaysia) - - Sex & Relationships - – CHOON YEE

Well, this also de­pends on the girl! If you de­velop feel­ings, you’re left with two choices: take ac­tion, or not. If you pick the for­mer, you need to de­cide how to make it work (as­sum­ing she wants this too). If you don’t, or the feel­ing’s not mu­tual, then you’ll have to deal. But it’s okay – there are plenty of other fish in the sea that you go hol­i­day­ing with.

I met my girl­friend when I went to study in Amer­ica, and we’re still in a sta­ble long-dis­tance re­la­tion­ship three years later. But then, af­ter I came back, I started talk­ing with my neigh­bour, which has now grown into a re­la­tion­ship. I still love my girl­friend, and ev­ery­one knows I’m still with her. But I want both girls, and I can’t make up my mind about who to be with. Please ad­vise. (PS. they don’t know about each other.)

– GABRIEL I’m gonna give it to you straight: don’t flat­ter your­self. You’re be­ing self­ish and not be­ing fair to ei­ther of these women. You say you know your girl­friend is the one for you and that you’re “in a sta­ble long-dis­tance re­la­tion­ship”. News­flash – this is not what a sta­ble re­la­tion­ship looks like! It’s only sta­ble be­cause they don’t know about each other, and if they did, shit’s likely gonna hit the fan. It’s time to end the de­ceit. Make a de­ci­sion, and do the right thing by these women. They de­serve bet­ter than this.

My girl­friend stopped hang­ing out with her guy friends be­cause of my envy. But I still hang out with my girl friends, and she doesn’t stop me from do­ing so. Could she be un­happy and not tell me about it?

– KAMARUL First things first: why are you im­pos­ing these dou­ble stan­dards on your girl­friend? Ex­am­ine the source of your envy, and find it within your­self to trust her to see her friends, re­gard­less of gen­der, just like she does you. Se­condly, if she isn’t com­mu­ni­cat­ing with you, and you sense that she’s un­happy, this is a red flag. Every­body needs an out­let; help her find hers.

There’s a girl that’s in­ter­ested in me, but I’m not com­fort­able that we share the same sur­name. Is that weird?

– BEN­JAMIN You’re think­ing waaaaay fur­ther ahead than the cur­rent sit­u­a­tion de­mands. You say she’s in­ter­ested in you, but are you in­ter­ested in her? If not, then there’s no prob­lem! If you are, then it de­pends how un­com­fort­able you are. If you re­ally like her but you’re re­ally con­cerned, and if it comes down to it, there’s al­ways ge­netic test­ing avail­able.

I’m a new en­tre­pre­neur and work’s been mad, but most of my dates just don’t un­der­stand why I’m al­ways so busy. How do I com­mu­ni­cate this?

– JAZLY I’m not go­ing to lie: dat­ing is go­ing to be tough for a guy like you. Not be­cause you’re un­like­able, but be­cause so much of your time is oc­cu­pied by your busi­ness. That’s per­fectly fine – ad­mirable, even. You will just need to find a girl who’s will­ing to see past that and ap­pre­ci­ate the lim­ited time you do have to­gether. And once you do, the time you spend to­gether will be even sweeter. Don’t give up on love just yet, tiger.

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