Family violence not just physical
Family violence takes many forms – not just physical abuse.
Any behaviour which controls or dominates another person in a family or intimate relationship is family violence.
This includes same sex relationships, siblings, flatmates, extended family and immediate family relationships and dating.
Violence can be physical, sexual, psychological or financial and can include neglect. Survivors say the effects of psychological abuse last the longest.
Psychological violence to adults or children includes:
Making someone feel like everything they do is wrong. Constant criticism. Using unsafe driving to frighten someone.
Isolating someone and friends.
Threatening to take the children away or to hurt them.
Stalking, following, checking up on someone. Harming pets. Sexual abuse includes forcing someone to have sex or do other sexual acts, unwanted touching and forcing someone to watch porn.
Physical abuse includes hitting, punching, biting, pushing, choking, pulling hair and using weapons.
Financial abuse includes taking someone’s money or property, running up debts in their name and pressuring a person into paying money.
Neglect means not providing food, clothing, warmth and medical treatment for dependent family members or leaving them alone or with someone who is not safe.
Below are some questions to ask about your relationship: Does your partner: Monitor what you do time?
Decide things for you that you
the should be allowed to decide (like what to wear or eat)?
Prevent or discourage you from seeing friends or family?
Control how you spend money?
Unfairly accuse you of cheating on them?
Destroy your property or things you care about?
Threaten to hurt you, your children or pets?
Blame you for their violent outbursts?
Threaten to harm himself/herself when upset with you?
Say things like ‘‘If I can’t have you then no-one can’’?
If you have answered yes to any or all of the questions above your relationship may not be safe. Family violence is a crime.
You can report any family violence to police even after it has happened.
Morrinsville Community House is a member of the Matamata Piako Family Safety Network and provides a free women’s education and support programme, Free-toFly, which is available to women across the district.
The programme promotes safety, healing and positive change. For more information on the programme phone 07 889 5355.
If you would like to find out more about family violence there are organisations across the district which can help you, see below for contact details.
The Matamata Piako Family Safety Network was formed in 2009 to address family violence in our district. The agencies involved work with both victims and offenders. The network also coordinates prevention activities across the district to raise awareness and reduce incidents of family violence.
In a crisis call 111 and ask for police.
Te Hauora 07 888 7870.
Child Youth 0508 326 459.
Starfish Social 07 888 8795.
services which can help