Stay­ing in is the new go­ing out


Why feel­ing the joy of miss­ing out is good for you

Did your ul­ti­mate Fri­day night used to in­volve drinks, din­ner, danc­ing, a big hit to the credit card and an ex­pen­sive ride home at 2am? And the same again on Satur­day? If that seems like a dis­tant mem­ory now, we’ll haz­ard a guess that this Fri­day you’re more likely to be set­tling in for a night of TV and a glass of wine than post­ing your freshly made up, town-ready face to In­sta­gram. Stay­ing in is the new go­ing out, though, haven’t you heard?

The FOMO (fear of miss­ing out) that used to pro­pel us out the door at the week­end isn’t so in­flu­en­tial to­day. In fact, many of us are now em­brac­ing the joy of miss­ing out as a way to boost our well­be­ing. While there are, of course, pos­i­tives to get­ting out of the house for a wild night (mem­o­ries made, friend­ships forged, find­ing a new burger joint that doesn’t skimp on the aioli, etc) you should never feel guilty about flag­ging it all for a night in – it’s for your health, af­ter all. If you still need con­vinc­ing that putting on a comfy pair of pants and mak­ing the most of your Net­flix sub­scrip­tion is good for you, read on…

Your ‘no’ mus­cle gets a work­out

Say­ing ‘no’ to some­one else means say­ing ‘yes’ to your­self. Think of it as a com­pli­ment to your­self and feel good about it. We’re pulled in so many dif­fer­ent di­rec­tions ev­ery day by the peo­ple around us, so be­ing aware of when you need to say ‘no’ and take some time for your­self is of the ut­most im­por­tance to your health and well­be­ing. Keep your ‘yes’ for the im­por­tant things, the op­por­tu­ni­ties that al­low you to give back and con­trib­ute to some­thing you feel is worth your time. When you over­com­mit and be­come stressed, you’re more likely to feel rundown and get sick. Re­mem­ber, your ‘no’ could be an op­por­tu­nity for some­one else to step up in­stead.

You’ll get more ‘me’ time

A study by the Bri­tish Psy­cho­log­i­cal So­ci­ety in 2015 showed that high-qual­ity me-time not only im­proves your well­be­ing, but it might also make you a more en­gaged em­ployee. “Over­all our re­search sug­gests if peo­ple take time out to recharge their bat­ter­ies and ex­pe­ri­ence the time taken out as high qual­ity, this reaps ben­e­fits for their own psy­cho­log­i­cal well­be­ing, their fam­ily re­la­tion­ships and for their em­ploy­ers as they are more likely to per­form bet­ter at work,” says Dr Al­muth McDowall from the Univer­sity of Birk­beck. Peo­ple are cot­ton­ing on to these ben­e­fits too, with self-care searches on Pin­ter­est sky­rock­et­ing up 121 per­cent since last year, ac­cord­ing to Pin­ter­est re­searcher Larkin Brown. Go on, draw your­self a bath, get into a good book, do some yoga in the liv­ing room or just en­joy a cup of tea in soli­tude. You de­serve it!

It’s a good ex­cuse to have a din­ner party

News­flash: stay­ing in doesn’t have to mean sit­ting at home on your own. If you’re feel­ing so­cial, in­vite a crew over to share in the fun of not go­ing “out” to­gether. Maybe there’s a rugby game on, a movie you and your friends have been dy­ing to watch, or you’re in the mood for a good old-fash­ioned games night. What­ever the oc­ca­sion, take the stress off be­ing the host by mak­ing the party a potluck and let the food come to you. The last thing you want to do is add anx­i­ety to your evening.

Have ac­tual qual­ity time with peo­ple you like

If a deep chat is on the cards, or you’re just af­ter some damn good con­ver­sa­tion, that’s not go­ing to hap­pen at a crowded bar. Go­ing from the lounge bar to the lounge room means hang­ing out only with the peo­ple you want to – bonus points for the fact that you don’t have to

queue for the bath­room, pay $12 for a sin­gle glass of wine or risk be­ing chat­ted up by a stranger when all you wanted was some QT with your girl­friend. Con­nect­ing with friends on a deeper level has been sci­en­tif­i­cally proven to be ben­e­fi­cial to your health, too. Yvonne L. Michael, lead re­searcher on the Nurses’ Health Study, which has gath­ered data on more than 100,000 nurses since 1976, says hav­ing strong friend­ship con­nec­tions is just as im­por­tant for good health as ex­er­cise. On, Michael ex­plains that close friend­ships “pro­vide a buf­fer for stress­ful liv­ing that is likely to play out through your im­mune and en­docrine sys­tems, al­low­ing you to age health­ier.”

Stay­ing in = sav­ing coin

What’s more, shift­ing your so­cial time from the club to the couch means you’re go­ing to save some se­ri­ous money. Take those sav­ings and in­vest them into up­ping the qual­ity of your time spent at home. Go to We’ar and buy a yoga mat that you’ll have for years (there’s a good one on page 16), splash out on a beau­ti­ful body scrub and give your­self a pam­per ses­sion, or spring for some loungewear that makes you feel a lit­tle more luxe. Bet­ter yet, think big and plan a hol­i­day. You’ll still have to work for it, but it’s a pretty good in­cen­tive to stay home, don’t you think?

1 Ri­fle Pa­per Co botan­i­cal jour­nal, $42, from Iko Iko.

2 Lau­rel mug, $9.95, from Cot­ton On Home. 3 Duett De­sign Playa Es­panola print, $149 (un­framed), from the­mar­ 4 Washed vel­vet quilted throw, $179, from Citta. 5 Dal­las drop-crotch track­pants, $39.95, from Cot­ton On Home. 6 Sig­na­ture round casse­role dish, from $460, from Le Creuset. 7 Wool loungers, $160, from All­birds.

8 Wild flower body oil, $35, from Coun­try Kitchen.

9 Akori cush­ion, $54.95, from Free­dom. 10 Ri­d­ley’s chess and check­ers, $70, from Mil­dred & Co. 11 Sweet Straw­berry & Black­berry Leaf can­dle, $49.95, from Ecoya.

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