Wordsworth Gabe Atkinson
This week, we invited readers to devise greeting-card rhymes for occasions that would usually be card-inappropriate.
Sybil Gregson of Wellington writes: Celebrate your brand-new dentures./ Cheers to culinary adventures! Hans Zindel, Palmerston North: Thinking of you as you’re getting things sorted/Now that you’ve officially been deported.
Kaye Bennetts, Whangaparaoa: Nice work on those demerit points/You’ve gathered quite a few./A hefty fine is on its way/We all say, “Well done, you.” Doug Parker, Queenstown: Due to intoxication and dubious love for fledglings in your flock/We congratulate you on being summarily defrocked.
Paul Kelly, Palmerston North: There’s a silver lining to your bankruptcy/You’ll make friends with the official assignee.
Rex McGregor, Auckland: Proud parents, big ups apropos:/Your daughter’s raunchy webcam show. Margi Parker, Queenstown: Noah took a positive view of flooding/Our thoughts are with you on your errant plumbing.
Poppy Sinclair, Karori: (To a world leader): You spread chaos, confusion, the world’s a mess/We salute you here at the Anarchist Press.
But Renée Boyer of Raglan takes the prize: Walking is wonderful, cycling is great/The bus isn’t bad if you don’t mind a wait./Taxis are handy and trains are the best/So well done on having your car repossessed!
For the next contest, create a name for an unworthy or morally questionable new charity and include a description of its mission. For example: FATCAT: Funnelling Arms To Central American Tyrants. Note: Your charity name doesn’t necessarily have to be an acronym. Entries, for the prize below, close at noon on Thursday, November 8.