Creating options gives us power to change our situations.
There is also the need to have a family framework for managing emotions. When our kids are really upset about something it can be wise to pause and firstly acknowledge their feelings –“I can see you’re really disappointed. That makes sense.” Make it okay for them to have the feeling – don’t try to talk them out of it or glide over it in the hope that you can get them moving on quickly! That can be counter-productive.
Sometimes kids just need to know that we know how they are feeling and then they’re able to move on by themselves. Other times, they may need to offload the story and the emotion. As they start to feel a little calmer, we can coach them to brainstorm ideas about what will make them feel better, how to sort the situation out or let it go. I ask kids to give me 'three good ideas'. Creating options give us power to change our situations. (It is good for