THE DARK TOWER (M, 95 MINS), DIRECTED BY NIKOLAJ ARCEL,
There is probably a pretty good film to be made from Stephen King’s series The Dark Tower. What I saw is not that film.
Or maybe The Dark Tower should never have been a film at all. A movie can just about do justice to a short novel. But an eight-volume series was crying out for the full Game of Thrones treatment, surely?
The Dark Tower sets itself up as a partial sequel to some of the events of the novels. The Gunslinger (Idris Elba, perfect) is an archetypal man-alone. The Gunslinger is on a mythic quest through a post-apocalyptic other world to protect The Dark Tower that stands at the centre of all alternate universes.
Meanwhile, in present-day New York City, 12-year-old Jake Chambers is having nightmares and drawing pictures that relate to The Gunslinger and the Tower. Of course, there are portals that connect our world to theirs and a slew of mythical evil beings living behind anonymous doorways throughout Brooklyn and Manhattan.
Put like that, The Dark Tower, even as a standalone movie, had plenty of potential. But the script is a bloviate mutt. And no amount of flair and flourish director