I’m in full support of naked ambition
This week, I was inundated with pictures of Adam Levine’s nipples. In many ways that’s just a standard week for me, but the volume this week was noticeably much higher.
Levine, the frontman of pop nightmare Maroon 5, was headlining the Super Bowl halftime show. It’s a big gig, millions of people watch it and the performance is subject to public and professional critique.
The band had already copped flak for accepting the gig. Reportedly, Rihanna had turned it down out of solidarity with Colin Kaepernick, the NFL quarterback who knelt during the national anthem in protest of treatment of African-Americans, and has since been blacklisted, and people were angry that Maroon 5 didn’t take a similar stance and, also, that people would now have to listen to Maroon 5.
Gratefully, the band rose above the criticism and bravely accepted millions of dollars to perform. It’s a true underdog story, if the true underdog story is about a group of mediocre white men achieving success with relatively few obstacles.
It should be said, I don’t mean any harm to Maroon 5. I’ve guiltily enjoyed many of their songs. But, as predicted, the performance was underwhelming.
They played their instruments, got all the chords right, and Adam sang a little off key, which I think is a cool move to make him approachable. If they had been playing at a wedding I probably would have said something like ‘‘great band’’ and ‘‘weird they keep playing originals though’’.
It could have been a largely unmemorable event, but just when it was about to slip into the recesses of my mind, where I keep everything I learnt in school, Adam took off his top.
Wow. Stunning stuff. He just took it off.
And not because he was having a hot flush and not because he got concerned about keeping an even tan during the show. He did it to be sexy. And, honestly, it paid off. He looked great. His tattooed torso was on full display, it suddenly became a real show. I, for one, think he was doing a public service. He looked wonderful, sounded just fine, and I was happy. It was easily the Super Bowl highlight.
I love that he just got his nipples out there for the world to see. He has a great body and it makes sense that he would show it. Especially if he was aware that maybe he was a bit off-key, absolutely it was the right move. It threw everyone off the scent.
After the show, a lot of people asked how come Levine could show his nipples, but when Janet Jackson was accidentally exposed for less than a second during her Super Bowl performance it was careerruining. It’s a valid question and it has no logical answer.
I love that Levine got his nipples out but, by the same token, I would support any female artist who also wanted to get theirs out. The only reason it’s considered taboo is because society has deemed female nipples sexual and male nipples not.
It’s a ridiculous assertion. It’s a toxic attitude, and I know it to be a completely false assumption, as I myself have sexualised many men’s nipples.
Eventually we’re all going to have to grow up and finally address our taboos, recalibrating what norms we’ve developed solely because our world view has been formed by men.
In aid of this process, let it be known here and now, should I ever perform at the Super Bowl halftime show, it is my solemn promise that I will do so topless.