Sunday Trust - - VIEWPOINT - El­, Twit­ter: @el­nathan with El­nathan John ec­

Dear­est Buhari,

Iknow we are both busy but I think we should take a break and do some fun ac­tiv­ity like vis­it­ing a park or watch­ing some nice videos to­gether. And I know just the right videos. There is this jour­nal­ist in Kano who has about 15 hi­lar­i­ous videos of a guy who looks like the Kano State Gov­er­nor Gan­duje (or is it him?) mak­ing wads of dol­lars dis­ap­pear from the hands of who is al­legedly a con­trac­tor. I think it will be fun to watch those videos in our spare time. It is re­ally en­ter­tain­ing and although I have watched some of them al­ready, I don’t mind watch­ing it again. It is in fact more fun when I watch videos with you. I don’t want to spoil the sus­pense but the most in­ter­est­ing thing is how he is re­ceiv­ing the money him­self, stuff­ing it into his bab­ban riga, that kind of low level, low tech cor­rup­tion that no­body can take se­ri­ously. I mean we both know noth­ing will hap­pen and I am sure Gan­duje just stole that money be­cause he re­alised that with all of the ten­sions in the coun­try, peo­ple dy­ing, tra­di­tional rulers be­ing kid­napped and killed on their way from se­cu­rity meet­ing, we would need some en­ter­tain­ment. I am sure the Kano peo­ple will elect him for an­other term just based on how en­ter­tain­ing he is.

What is this I am hear­ing about your WAEC cer­tifi­cate? I know you can­not find it. But who cares? Ask­ing you to pro­duce your WAEC cer­tifi­cate is like ask­ing a per­son who is the Mas­ter of Cer­e­monies at a wed­ding for his wed­ding in­vi­ta­tion. The man is the MC. If he didn’t have an in­vi­ta­tion he wouldn’t have been there in the first place. I know their plan. It is to make peo­ple think that you are not smart. But me I think you are smart. Which is why you don’t speak much or do pub­lic de­bates with can­di­dates who are be­neath you. Be­cause in the end you know that what Nige­ri­ans need is not an­other per­son who speaks or an­other cer­tifi­cate holder but some­one who is with a large heart, who can for­give some­one like Kemi Adeo­sun I saw that Gan­duje was able to pull out chil­dren from school, make them hold plac­ards in his de­fence as the jour­nal­ist who re­leased those videos tes­ti­fied be­fore the Kano House of As­sem­bly. I think that is re­mark­able. We might need to ask him to bor­row us those chil­dren when we be­gin our own cam­paigns.

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