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Sunday Trust - - TAMBARI - TAM­BARI

HA­JIYA BINTA SHEHU BA­MALLI // al­ways good for you to plant good so that you can reap well. Peo­ple will hurt you, life will be tough on you, things are go­ing to be very dif­fi­cult, but one thing is cer­tain - time will take care of it all. As­pi­ra­tions grow­ing up It has re­ally changed. I have al­ways been some­one who just wanted to en­joy life and I al­ways lived my life that way. Se­condly, I al­ways as­pired to work in an of­fice. I started study­ing Medicine in the univer­sity be­fore switch­ing to Mi­cro­bi­ol­ogy. I just knew I wasn’t in­ter­ested in it. I wanted to work in an of­fice and not the lab. So I did a post­grad­u­ate di­ploma in Busi­ness Ad­min­is­tra­tion, then an MBA. Joys of moth­er­hood It can’t just be ex­plained. There’s a whole hu­man life that de­pends on me. It al­ways baf­fles me how you don’t even see when they grow. It’s just like magic. It melts my heart. Fond child­hood mem­o­ries What I miss the most is spend­ing time with my dad. Peo­ple al­ways asked about the rest of my sib­lings when my dad and I were do­ing our fa­ther-daugh­ter thing. And hon­estly,we were too busy with our­selves that they didn’t re­ally mat­ter. There was a time my younger brother asked my dad why he loved only me. And he said it’s not that he loved only me, but “when she came, she was my first love be­fore you all came along, and other fam­ily re­spon­si­bil­i­ties as well.’’ I also miss sit­u­a­tions when we would trick my mum and make her fu­ri­ous while we were busy laugh­ing. How you met your hus­band I met my hus­band in his of­fice. I went to the of­fice com­plex look­ing for the of­fice of the di­rec­tor of pro­cure­ment. I was given the wrong di­rec­tions and I ended up in the of­fice of the di­rec­tor, PSR. I stated my mis­sion and he took my card. We got talk­ing and one thing led to an­other. And the rest is his­tory.

Most cher­ished at­tribute of your hus­band

His tol­er­ance and un­der­stand­ing. Above all, he is very kind. Ad­vice for cou­ples Com­mu­ni­ca­tion is key in build­ing a fam­ily. Cou­ples should be open­minded. A lot of us, both men and women, as­sume that our spouses al­ready know what we want, or that he/she is sup­posed to know what you mean. How is that pos­si­ble? Both par­ties need to learn the art of com­mu­ni­ca­tion. Apol­o­gis­ing isn’t a big deal for my hus­band. I no­tice that there are a lot of men who can’t apol­o­gise, even when they know they are at fault. Best travel des­ti­na­tion For peace and calm­ness, I will say Saudi Ara­bia. You can do your wor­ship­ping and get a dif­fer­ent feel­ing when you are there. It gives you a sense of be­long­ing as a hu­man be­ing. How you re­lax My house is my favourite place in the world. When I go out I miss it and I’m ea­ger to go back. I find all the love and the fun at home. It’s my safe haven.

Last good book you read and how it has im­pacted on you

There’s a book ti­tled, A Gift for a Mus­lim Bride. I didn’t read it when I got mar­ried; I stum­bled on it later on. It’s a book that gives you prac­ti­cal ex­am­ples on how to live your life peace­fully with your hus­band and in-laws. Some peo­ple may not have any prob­lem with their hus­bands, but in-laws. I’ve recommended it to many peo­ple and even given it to peo­ple I knew were get­ting mar­ried. It has most of the val­ues I hold dear and gives me con­fi­dence. It tells you that you are on the right path, and how to en­joy your life to the fullest. Favourite food Fresh Okro and any swal­low. For drinks, I like pineapple juice. Def­i­ni­tion of style I’m not re­ally a fash­ion per­son. As long as I’m com­fort­able, I’m good. And if I’m at home, I love to wear any­thing free. Favourite bag and per­fume I love Calvin Klein bags, prob­a­bly be­cause of my hus­band. He buys things bet­ter than I do. Lately, for per­fume, I’ve been do­ing Roberto Cavalli, Carolina Her­rera and Tom Ford’s oud. Mum’s ad­vice that stuck with you over the years She al­ways cau­tioned me on my lazi­ness. I didn’t wash dishes, I didn’t cook; I didn’t do any­thing in the house. So she used to tell me that if I con­tin­ued like that, by the time I would get mar­ried, she would come and see the per­son that would be tak­ing care of my house. At the end of the day, when it hap­pened I didn’t know what to do. My cook­ing wasn’t very fab­u­lous. So I tried to scale up; and that’s when I had to try very hard to learn how to cook and house­clean. Af­ter I be­came an adult I be­gan to ap­pre­ci­ate all she did for me. I was an­gry about it but now I’m happy she did. Favourite sport, weather, car and colour While I was in sec­ondary school, I played vol­ley­ball and high jump. I even com­peted in a com­pe­ti­tion for my school in Kaduna. But af­ter that I didn’t have pas­sion for sports. I love cool weather. For cars, I like Honda. It’s easy to main­tain and eco­nom­i­cal. I love pur­ple be­cause it looks very beau­ti­ful on me. It brings out more of my beauty and makes me look stun­ning. Favourite day of the week Any day of the week, as long as I am at home and my hus­band is around. Beauty rou­tine I don’t have any. I just take my bath, use baby oil and that’s it. Role mod­els My par­ents are my role mod­els be­cause they shaped my life. I emu­late the things they did. It will stick with me to the end.

back, what would you tell a younger you?

woLook­ing mI would tell her to lis­ten more to her mother. Yes, she may be over­bear­ing and you will think she is be­ing too hard, but there are cer­tain things I would have learnt bet­ter and ear­lier if I were more open. She went to the univer­sity af­ter she had me, so I grew up with my dad. By the time she was done and came back, I was al­ready used to a par­tic­u­lar per­son - my dad. So, lis­ten to your par­ents when they are teach­ing you some things. It may seem hard, but they are do­ing the right thing. Most cher­ished gift from your hus­band He does every­thing I want. There’s hardly any­thing I want that he doesn’t do. It gets me emo­tional, such that some­times I sit and cry be­cause it’s not ev­ery­one that is lucky enough to have a man that treats you that way. He also lis­tens to me when I talk to him. He is al­ways open-minded and ac­cepts sug­ges­tions. But there’s no sac­ri­fice too big for him to make for me. It’s very im­por­tant to me. Favourite mu­sic I used to do mu­sic when I was in the univer­sity, but not any­more. First/last app you check ev­ery­day What­sApp, be­cause of fam­ily groups. We talk a lot there. So if there’s some­thing we are miss­ing out on, we catch up there; most es­pe­cially be­fore I go to bed, just to make sure ev­ery­one is okay.

Ad­vice to younger women who aspire to be like you

Keep it sim­ple and be fo­cused. Know what you want and stick to it. But most im­por­tantly, for you to be any­where in life, you need a sup­port sys­tem. It may be your fam­ily, friends, who­ever. Find out who they are and lean on them to make life bet­ter and eas­ier for you.

The In­ter­na­tional Olympic Com­mit­tee has ap­pointed the Ele­gushi of Ikate land, Oba Sa­heed Ade­mola Ele­gushi as one of the pa­trons of as part of the Nige­rian Olympic Com­mit­tee. The Royal High­ness was given this honour due to his con­tri­bu­tions in sports since he be­came Oba.

Oba Sa­heed Ele­gushi ex­pressed how hon­oured he was by the ap­point­ment as promised to use his new role to fur­ther pro­mote fair in­ter­na­tional sports­man­ship and unity.

An in­vesti­ture cer­e­mony took place at Ikate, the king­dom which the Oba is rul­ing and was at­tended by a cal­iber of per­son­al­i­ties such as foot­ball stars Joseph Yobo, Kanu Nwankwo and Sam­son Si­a­sia, award­win­ning par­a­lympians Bose Omo­layo and Ke­hinde Paul.

Also present were Sen­a­tor Asi­waju Bola Ahmed Tin­ubu, former Gov­er­nor of La­gos State and Na­tional Leader of the All Pro­gres­sives Congress, APC, HRH, Oba Ab­dul­rasheed Akanbi, the Oluwo of Iwo (Telu 1), Chief (Mrs), Ko­foworola Nwokedi, and the former gov­er­nor of Delta state, Dr Em­manuel Eweta Udughan.

Noth­ing less than 27 Nige­ri­ans have made it to one of Bri­tain’s most pow­er­ful and in­flu­en­tial list, the Pow­erlist. The an­nual pub­li­ca­tion aims to pro­vide a pub­li­ca­tion ded­i­cated to peo­ple of African and Caribbean de­cent who have made pos­i­tive im­pact and play in­flu­en­tial roles in the United King­dom and around the world. Apart from me­dia mogul Mo Abudu and ac­tor John Boyega, oth­ers who made the list in­clude boxer An­thony Joshua and Meghan Markle. Mo Abudu shared the news where she said, “The Pow­erlist is the most au­thor­i­ta­tive recog­ni­tion of Black in­flu­ence in the U.K. There­fore, I am hon­oured and hum­bled to be in­cluded. It’s nice to know that those of us who re­turn home to make our con­tri­bu­tions are not be­ing over­looked.”

COM­MU­NI­CA­TION IS KEY IN BUILD­ING A FAM­ILY. COU­PLES SHOULD BE OPEN-MINDED.

The fam­ily of the Alaafin of Oyo, LamidiAdeyemi III con­tin­ues to grow as he and his with Queen Anu, wel­comed an­other set of twins, a boy and a girl af­ter wel­com­ing two other sets of twins ear­lier this year in Fe­bru­ary. The Queen shared the ex­cit­ing news on her In­sta­gram page where she said, “I can’t con­tain this hap­pi­ness. Thank you Lord for your faith­ful­ness. Wel­come my Prince and Princess. Won­der­ful bun­dles of joy, I still can’t be­lieve that I’m now a mother.

Thank you Lord for this bless­ings. I pray that may the peace of God dwell with us.”

Con­grat­u­la­tions to them!

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