TRUE STORY Can I Trust Her Again?

The Guardian (Nigeria) - - LOVE&LIFE - For mar­riage coun­sel­ing please call Si­monon07032944123

IFEEL such a loser. Our en­tire time to­gether has been a sham and a lie. Ev­ery Christ­mas, birth­day and hol­i­day was a joke be­cause she was al­ways think­ing about “him”. Now she’s say­ing that we can start again, but can we? Can I re­ally for­give six years of fibs, tall sto­ries and her elab­o­rate ex­cuses? Her lover died few months back; that’s how all of this has fi­nally come out.

His fu­neral was a messy af­fair with his wife, my part­ner and an­other se­cret lover all com­ing to blows. I didn’t even re­alise my part­ner was there. She’d told me she was at a con­fer­ence (an­other lie).

I only found out the truth when an­other mourner dropped her off at home, all dressed in black and with a bloody nose. I de­manded the truth and now I know ev­ery sor­did de­tail. I know about the week­ends away, the ho­tel rooms and the sneaky sex.

Ap­par­ently her lover was a strong, de­mand­ing man who was used to get­ting his own way. She wanted to break up with him, but didn’t know how. It’s only now, in death, that she’s able to be com­pletely hon­est with me. My heart is bro­ken and my con­fi­dence crushed. I thought that we had a good life to­gether. I never once sus­pected or doubted her, even when she dis­ap­peared for days on end (vis­it­ing rel­a­tives), took money from our joint ac­count or gave me a sex­u­ally trans­mit­ted in­fec­tion (ap­par­ently from a toi­let seat).

Now I know bet­ter and re­alise that I’ve been played like a bat­tered vi­o­lin. How could any­one be so cal­cu­lat­ing and cruel over such a long pe­riod of time? And can we ever truly love again?

Ad­vice: Dear read­ers, please mail your com­ments, re­ac­tions or true love sto­ries, quiz or per­sonal ex­pe­ri­ence you wish to share to this email: si­monclar@ya­

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