Se­cu­rity check..!

Pakistan Observer - - OPINION -

WAS

fly­ing out the other day and hav­ing gone through se­cu­rity check a lit­tle early had noth­ing else to do be­fore board­ing the flight but sit on the com­fort­able chairs pro­vided by the air­port au­thor­i­ties and watch oth­ers go­ing through their check. I found var­i­ous kinds of peo­ple com­ing through Se­cu­rity Check:

The Flap­per: This gen­tle­man came through first with his arms down, then on see­ing se­cu­rity per­sonal flapped his arms up, then flapped them down, af­ter mis­judg­ing the dis­tance, then flapped them up again on reach­ing the plat­form, then flapped them af­ter the of­fi­cer had checked his arms. The num­ber of times he flapped away made me won­der why he just didn’t flap his way to his des­ti­na­tion, in­stead of wast­ing hard earned money on plane ticket.

The Take-Off Pas­sen­ger: He walked into se­cu­rity check with his arms, per­pen­dic­u­lar to chest, and kept them straight out even af­ter se­cu­rity had checked his pock­ets, his wal­let, his shoes and even his socks. I knew he was wait­ing for air traf­fic con­troller to ra­dio him to start zooming up the run­way; I strained to hear the roar of en­gines, the strain­ing of ailerons and po­si­tion­ing of rud­der as he whizzed past me, past po­lice at the door, onto run­way and zip­ping, clip­ping full throt­tle for take- off!

Dr Jekyll and Mrs Hyde: Then came Mrs Hyde: She scowled at co­pas­sen­gers, she scowled at the pas­sen­ger in front who was tak­ing a tri­fle too long, and then sud­denly as her turn came to be checked, Dr Jekyll took over as her face broke out into the most beau­ti­ful smile I’d ever seen.

She smiled at the beep- beep door­post, which beeped thir­teen to the dozen as she passed through then gave the loveli­est smile to the lady who was go­ing to check her. She smiled as her arms were touched, smiled even more as her legs were pat­ted and then scowled as the lady of­fi­cer said her hand­bag had to be checked. That was the quick­est smile to frown change I’d seen; quite a Jekyll and Hide trans­for­ma­tion. Busy Busi­ness­man: The busy busi­ness­man who came in next had me all at­ten­tive: He rushed in with his eyes al­ready on the flight, al­ready on des­ti­na­tion, his eyes on cus­tomer, his ears al­ready hear­ing busi­ness talk and his nose al­ready smelling dol­lars, ru­pees and pounds ster­ling. He raised hands, legs, any­thing the se­cu­rity told him to raise, his mind not here, his eyes dis­tant and far away. The man at the counter stamped his board­ing pass and I knew he didn’t need no card for board­ing, he’d al­ready reached the other end.

I was just about to ob­serve the next per­son when I felt a tap on my shoulder, “We have been ob­serv­ing you sir!” “What have I done?” I asked fright­ened. “Will you come with us to the de­ten­tion room! You keep ob­serv­ing our se­cu­rity check to see how you can beat se­cu­rity next time isn’t it? You are a fu­ture hi­jacker!”

“Noooo!” I shouted as I was dragged away for in­ter­ro­ga­tion. “Now mis­ter will you please tell us what you were do­ing?” —Email:bob­s­ban­ter@gmail.com

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