THE ULTIMATE GIFT FOR HIM
He’s been a good boy this year? Instead of blowing all your cash on him, just blow him! It’s all he really wants for Xxx-mas anyway. These tips will make the gesture extra special.
the organ tuner
Kick off the festive penis party by lubing him up with saliva, but don’t go ham on the head right away— it’s super-sensitive. Vary up the stimulation, running your tongue up and down his shaft like you’re a jazz musician playing a harmonica.
Make an okay sign with your hand, then press your pointer finger above your upper lip like a mustache and your thumb below your lower lip. Hug his penis with the rest of your fingers and go to town— it’ll feel to him like you’re taking more of him into your mouth than you actually are.
the never-ending handy Keep your hands in constant motion while you work him with your mouth, giving him the sensation of nonstop penetration.
tinsel his tree The penis actually has a “root” that extends inside the body (underneath his balls). Massage the area while you’re blowing him and he might just break out into a stirring rendition of “O Holy Night.”
the human s’more
Toast his marshmallows—
lightly cup and massage his balls—from the get-go. Playing with his delicate sugarplums makes the beej feel more intense. Just remember to be gentle: They’re not stress balls.
the deep dive Save deep-throat action for the final moments of oral to avoid a sore throat and gagging. Take a deep breath, and bust it out as a magic trick to push him over the edge. You’re the David Blaine of BJS!
the tricky twister Twist one hand up and down his candy cane while you move your tongue in circles on the head. It’s a double-pleasure trick— and great for speeding things up when Homeland is on in four minutes.