Lost in Tran­si­tion

WHEN ALL IS SAID AND DONE, THE FOL­LOW­ING HON­OREES WILL BE AS RE­MEM­BERED AS THIS YEAR’S GUSI PEACE PRIZE RE­CIP­I­ENTS

Esquire (Philippines) - - MAHB OBITUARIES - BY DICK JOAQUIN

JUN Even ABAYAafter 117[ 1] years, we still shouldn’t have an Aguinaldo in gov­ern­ment. SEP­A­RA­TION OF CHURCH AND STATE IN RE­LA­TION TO THE AD­MIN­IS­TRA­TION OF TRAF­FIC LAWS Yield to the Ro­man Pope and the Filipino Pope.

OS­CAR CRUZ [ 2] For a man who speaks so much against ev­ery­thing, he was too scared to be in­ter­viewed by Car­los Cel­dran.

PRISON NURSES No more Johnny Ponce En­riles to be sponge­bathed.

FIDEL V. RAMOS Twenty years later, not ev­ery Back­street Boy de­serves a come­back.

TAX RE­LIEF FOR THE MID­DLE CLASS

Hey Mid­dle Class, ex­cept in sang­gu­ni­ang elec­tions for cer­tain barangays, your votes do not count! TITO Fi­nally, BOBOYa pres­i­den­tial SYJUCO cam­paign that ad­dress­esour fic­tion­ists.the so­cial ills pre­scribed by

P. Be­cause BUR­GOS, rich MAKATIkids ruin ev­ery­thing.

UR­BAN­DUB All farewells should be sud­den. Ask Sug­ar­free.

THE NEXT RA­MEN HOUSE TO OPEN See en­try for Tax Re­lief for the Mid­dle Class.

JIM PARE­DES [ 3] Never much of a singer, with Twit­ter he found his voice. Makes you wish he hadn’t.

NE­TI­ZENS Now a sep­a­rate line item in fi­nan­cial re­ports sub­mit­ted to the COM­ELEC

SULPICIO LINES Who­ever was re­spon­si­ble for mirac­u­lously al­low­ing it to sur­vive un­til 2015 de­serves can­on­iza­tion.

TOBY TIANGCO [ 4]

Gone but not for­got­ten.

CINE­MALAYA FES­TI­VAL

Still the worst story in lo­cal film.

JAM 88.3 It’s like NU 107.5 mi­nus any knowl­edge of ac­tual mu­sic.

KIT TATAD [ 5] Most no­table achieve­ments in the past in­clude read­ing Procla­ma­tion 1081 while scratch­ing his balls on na­tional tele­vi­sion and sport­ing Nehru col­lars on the floor of the se­nate. Has since found God but con­tin­ues to kiss Lu­cifer’s ass.

THE COM­MIS­SION ON ELEC­TIONS Give them credit for no longer pre­tend­ing that it’s all one big joke. PAGCORIt’s not gam­bling if you al­ready know you’re get­ting screwed.

MARTINA true man ROMUALDEZof the peo­ple with posters all over North Forbes.

SHOW­TIME Is there any­thing sad­der than giv­ing your own eu­logy dur­ing your own show?

THE 16TH CONGRESS

Democ­racy at its finest fin­ery.

RIGOBERTO TIGLAO [ 6] The for­mer am­bas­sador to Greece is now spit­ting non­sense on broad­sheets. It’s what peo­ple call a Greek Tragedy.

BANGSAMORO BA­SIC LAW

Be­cause who are we kid­ding, really? LIB­ERAL PARTY Six years later, it still thinks that the Aquino vic­tory was a party vic­tory. GRINGO HONASAN [ 7] Failed to de­stroy Philip­pine democ­racy (at least twice), is ask­ing for your votes this com­ing elec­tion. THE COM­MU­NI­CA­TIONS GROUP How many idiots does it take to screw the pres­i­dent? RE­CENT HISTORY Vice Pres­i­dent Bong­bong Mar­cos sends his con­do­lences.

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from Philippines

© PressReader. All rights reserved.