The never end­ing hor­ri­ble in­set re­views

Sun.Star Baguio - - Opinion -

ONCE upon a time in a colony not far away, the queen of the jun­gle called all the cara baos for a meet­ing. The agenda is how to tame wild wean­ers (young pig).

Tam­ing wean­ers re­quire ed­u­ca­tion and skills. So that as years pass by, it be­came a pro­fes­sion. As the pro­fes­sion pro­gresses, ranks were de­signed to dis­tin­guish vari­a­tion in terms of knowl­edge and skills.

Thus, each carabao has to ex­ert ef­fort in or­der to ac­quire the de­sired rank. To lead a colony, a prin­ci­pal carabao and sub­or­di­nate heads are needed.

Time passed by, the rank es­ca­lates, spawn­ing masters, doc­tors, and sim­ply the rank of carabao one, two or three. With nu­mer­ous ranks, tam­ing wean­ers evolved var­i­ous meth­ods and strate­gies. To el­e­vate ranks, carabaos are re­quired to have self-as­sess­ment. The self-as­sess­ment, pop­u­larly known as the ob­ject of yearly or in­set review has been in­sti­tu­tion­al­ize. At first re­views are very sim­ple, just name your tam­ing plans, the strate­gies and meth­ods used and the ma­te­ri­als in­volve.

All carabaos are re­quired in the planning and ex­e­cu­tion of the re­views. Un­til re­cently, the planning has been mo­nop­o­lize by heads or prin­ci­pals. Thus, seat­ing al­most all of the time in four days and lis­ten­ing to re­peated lec­tures are com­mon sights re­sult­ing to carabaos ly­ing in wa­ter­holes or play­ing with muds. Most promi­nent are the rules re­quir­ing all carabaos to prac­tice “pos­i­tive, no touch” ap­proach in tam­ing wild, ar­ro­gant and un­ruly wean­ers who sees every place as a jun­gle.

As carabao doc­tors in­creases, meth­ods and strate­gies also in­creases, be­came a law and it has com­pli­cated the re­views.

Self-as­sess­ments then were dis­sected which made the carabao life more stren­u­ous to a point that per­for­mance must have a qual­i­fi­ca­tion num­ber equal to sat­is­fac­tory, very sat­is­fac­tory or out­stand­ing.

Shock­ingly, the faith of the self-as­sess­ment tools will be left later on, in the faith­ful hands of the head or prin­ci­pal carabaos. No check and bal­ance tools was de­signed by the queen of the jun­gle to en­sure pros­per­ity and har­mony. Thus, year in and year out re­views are re­sem­bling the colour of a white ele­phant. No test­ing tools were brought out to check if it is ef­fi­cient or purely a waste of colony’s re­sources. Cer­tainly, mid-year re­views were done be­fore Hal­loween, so that when the carabao sense the sched­ule, it whim­pers “here comes the hor­ri­ble mid-year review”.

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