SPILLING DA BEANS

The Star (St. Lucia) - Life Begins 2 Nite - - NEWS - By Biky B

Boy, ah have to say ah never re­al­ize how much peo­ple was miss­ing Biky. De kinda feed­back ah get all through de week­end. Ah tell you it al­most knock me back on my you know what. So lemme just say thanks to all ah you for de emails and de com­ments.

Tithing or Tief­ing: I hear more peo­ple dan ever look­ing to­wards de church for a help­ing hand dese days, but boy is like some pas­tors too busy help­ing dem­selves to worry about other souls in need. A mem­ber of a cer­tain Cas­tries con­gre­ga­tion tell Biky B dat if any­one want to pass her pas­tor a love gift it bet­ter not cost less dan $250. It seem dats de rules of de church. De mem­ber tell Biky B not even for her hus­band she buy­ing gifts so ex­pen­sive. She choops and tell me she eh go­ing to dat church again be­cause is only money dem preach­ers into, and some­times with a lit­tle flesh on de side too, eh.

Fly­ing priest: Talk­ing about gents of de cloth, well boy de grand Pooba and de Dove clash again on Satur­day. Now from all Biky B know dem two have long his­tory. I mean go­ing back till when. But at de week­end is like peo­ple de­cide to for­get all dem sto­ries about de fada be­ing more dan an or­di­nary fada. Know what I mean? You shoulda hear de cheers he get when he stand up to give de Dove a clip­ping on be­half of de dol­phins. De man of de cloth get so vi­cious not even Steven Sea­gal couldn’ta save de Dove.

cab sex: A cer­tain for­mer cab-sec have plenty of time on his hands dese days. And just by co­in­ci­dence, so does his side chick. So nat­u­rally is hanky- panky morn­ing, noon and night. Like she give up on ev­ery­thing else in­clud­ing de yout. De way tings go­ing de de­serted young peo­ple will ei­ther have to find an­other spokesper­son or do dere own cam­paign­ing. Dat’s de trou­ble with liv­ing in glass house. You cyan be tellin’ de youth to stay away from mar­ried men while you eh tak­ing your own ad­vice.

soupap: Just when you tink you’ve heard it all. Dis one had Biky B rolling on de floor. De way dey tell me, dis Looshan sales­woman was over­heard telling a tourist in jew­elry store about how her man is a cheat­ing dog. Imag­ine de tourist just come to buy a ring for his wife but some­how de sales­woman end up telling him her pri­vate busi­ness and how all Looshan men good for is cheat­ing. She go as far as telling de tourist dat she dis­cover va­jie juice from a next wo­man in her hus­band car. Doh ask Biky how she know is va­jie juice on de car seat. Or how it got dere. Or how long it sit­ting dere. Lit­tle did Ms Sales­woman know de tourist is a big-time ra­dio per­son­al­ity in Toronto. Next ting her story end up on de man show dat a lotta Looshans does lis­ten to. De man men­tion de name of the jew­elry store and he even de­scribe de sales­woman who tell him about what she find on her hubby car seat. In no time de story gone vi­ral and every­body talk­ing about de “Looshan va­jie Juice episode.” Boy, ah tell you!

On dat soppy note ah tink ah have to go wet my throat. Ah go leave it dere for now un­til next time. Doh for­get, you can al­ways drop me a line at bikyb@gmail.com okay. Ah gone!

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