SPILLING DA BEANS

The Star (St. Lucia) - Life Begins 2 Nite - - NEWS - By Biky B

Wel­come again to Biky B’s world where noth­ing is fake, un­like what all you get­ting nowa­days from SLAPS, CLAPS, PAPS, CAPS and all kinda APPS. Woy, ah swear ah cyar take it no more, al­though now and then ah does take a peek just to see wha’ go­ing on in the fake world. Now and den, ah cyar lie, ah does find a lil’ some­thing.

Coolie Town: Tings get­ting real dread on Face­book dem days es­pe­cially on dem po­lit­i­cal pages where you cyar tell what is real news from fake or imag­ined. De lat­est con­cerns one very vo­cal FB con­trib­u­tor dat get re­ported to Face­book for us­ing a ra­cial slur. Eh ben bon. Biky B hear dey kick de woman out with­out a cap for re­fer­ring to a cer­tain min­is­ter as a cool­lie. Now ah eh know about all you, but as if to me from school days we used to call all In­dian friends coolie. Dey didn’t seem to mind. Ah well ah guess we liv­ing in de age. Back in de day, peo­ple kept dere pain in dere chest, even if dey was dy­ing. Re­mem­ber how com­mon in dese parts it was to call a man of your own color a nasty name dat turn into de N-word?

Willy Wonka: Now Biky B doh pro­mote no kinda vi­o­lence. But ah have to say some of our peo­ple like it when a man get ketch with his pants down and also get some licks at de same time. De way ah hear it, dis ca­lyp­so­nian been on a ren­dezvous with an­nuder man wife now for months. Well last week he fi­nally got ketch in de act, in his car. Biky B hear de woman hus­band pull up on dem and start to dish out some real licks on de man. Then she throw him outta de ve­hi­cle and leggo a slug in his leg. Now ah eh know about all dat vi­o­lence ting, eh. But fel­las, ah warn­ing you, take con­trol of your willy nuh!

High Pro­duc­tion: Ah won­der if ah go see de day when a cer­tain lo­cal mu­sic pro­ducer and his baby mama stop hav­ing drama. Ah mean town was happy when dey see de man for de first time hold­ing de girl hands in pub­lic when dey first met. Some­thing mate does never do. But since de baby born padna on a roll, ramp­ing from chick to chick. De lat­est one is a good friend of de baby mama who self eh have no shame, one minute she lim­ing with de girl, next day she in bed with de girl man. Eh ben bon.!

Three-pointer – So ah by de beach last week­end and I over­hear two ladies talk­ing dat I know are mod­els some of de time. One ah dem say she didn’t ex­pect de ud­der to have so much fun de night be­fore. To which girl B says: But is you dat in­vite me. De first girl say: But ur my friend and I just wanted to try some­thing for him. But now I tink he like you and you like him. Doh worry though, you go get it if you cross me and my man. I dere won­der­ing what dem ladies talk­ing about. You know how Biky B in­no­cent in dem kinda ting. Den de sec­ond lady say: Aa girl, is like your first time you done a three­some? Why you get­ting on so? Yes, is only den Biky B re­al­ize what go­ing on. Boy, let me leave dat here, you hear?

Any­way dat’s ma space for this week. Ah have to leave it here. Hope all you have a good stress-free week­end. But keep an eye out for dem beans and re­mem­ber you can drop me a line at bikyb@gmail.com.

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