The 5 Most Im­por­tant Peo­ple To For­give Be­fore The End Of The Year

The Star (St. Lucia) - - LOCAL - By

Shan­non Kaiser

the year comes to an end, many of us fo­cus on res­o­lu­tions, goals and adopt­ing new healthy habits. The month of De­cem­ber is of­ten filled with travel, fam­ily time and hol­i­day par­ties. With it can come stress and frus­tra­tion. One of the most over­looked ways to de-stress is to go in­ward and re­lease anger.

Many of us hold onto re­sent­ment with­out re­al­iz­ing it. Your boss didn't pro­mote you, your ex re­mar­ried, the big SUV took your park­ing spot. Money woes and hol­i­day stress can add a lot of pres­sure to the mix.

If you want to start the New Year truly feel­ing bal­anced and em­pow­ered, look at all your re­la­tion­ships and see who you can for­give.

When you for­give oth­ers, it doesn't ex­cuse their be­hav­iour. For­give­ness is an act of kind­ness to your own heart. When you for­give, you pre­vent your­self from hurt­ing. You move on. You take the high road. You're free.

To feel free this hol­i­day sea­son, for­give th­ese five sets of peo­ple in your life:

1. Your ex-lover(s)

For­giv­ing your ex-lover(s) doesn't mean say­ing what hap­pened is OK. It just means you've ac­cepted the sit­u­a­tion and can now see the big pic­ture. When you for­give, it isn't about the other per­son. It is about open­ing up your fu­ture be­cause you've fi­nally for­given your past.

Hold­ing on to past re­la­tion­ships after they ex­pire is part of heal­ing a bro­ken heart. When you love some- one, you never truly get over them. Love is love and can never die. The form of the love changes and you may be in a po­si­tion where you're no longer with the per­son you once loved. When you hold onto emo­tions and re­play neg­a­tive as­pects of the re­la­tion­ship, you put your­self in a hold­ing pat­tern of anger. Re­leas­ing that anger and let­ting go of re­gret will help you wel­come a new start.

2. Your par­ents

Your par­ents are do­ing the best they can with the in­for­ma­tion they have. They were raised a par­tic­u­lar way and passed on only what they knew. As you grow up into your own beau­ti­ful be­ing, par­ents may re­sist or be un­com­fort­able with cer­tain as­pects of your life­style. For­give them. They mean well, but it's up to you to align with your own truth. The best thing you can do is not take what they say, or don't say, per­son­ally. In­stead, rec­og­nize that they want the same thing you want: to be happy, healthy and free of emo­tional bur­dens.

3. Your chil­dren

If you have chil­dren, they may do things that don't make sense to you. Give them per­mis­sion to ex­plore and do things that res­onate with their own heart. For­give them for act­ing out or say­ing things that hurt you. When peo­ple hurt us, it is just them try­ing to make sense of a world that is hurt­ing them. Do your best to for­give them and love them for who they are grow­ing to be.

4. Your boss

Work­place re­la­tion­ships can af­fect us on a deep level, in many ways we aren't even aware of. Are you har­bor­ing re­sent­ment be­cause your co-worker got the raise be­fore you did? Or maybe your boss keeps ig­nor­ing your bril­liant ideas? For­give them. Next time a co-worker or boss does some­thing that causes you frus­tra­tion, go in­ward and re­mind your­self they know not what they do. Align with your own heart and for­give them.

5. Your­self

You are far too hard on your­self. This hol­i­day sea­son, you can for­give ev­ery­one else. But if you for­get to look in­ward and for­give your­self, you will still feel a void.

You can't start the next chap­ter of your life if you are hold­ing on to the past. To make the New Year your best year yet, for­give your­self for not be­ing where you think you should be and rec­og­nize you are ex­actly where you need to be to get to where you want to be.

Con­sider that ev­ery­thing in your life has led you up to this point right here, right now. You have made no wrong turns, there are no mis­takes. Where you sit, in this very mo­ment, im­per­fect. You are enough and per­fect as you are. For­give your­self.

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