Think, Saint Lu­cia, be­fore you dip!

The Star (St. Lucia) - - LOCAL - By Dale El­liot

Do unto oth­ers, then run! My good friend Arthur Nep­tune lives by this motto and many a time I chuckle at such ac­cu­rate and pro­found stu­pid­ity. The flags are be­ing nailed on the lamp poles, colour­ful stick­ers are mag­i­cally ap­pear­ing on au­to­mo­biles, and lit­tle old ladies in the vil­lage next door are chang­ing their drapes to be po­lit­i­cally cor­rect. I lick my index fin­ger and hold it to the wind. Yes there is a stupid breeze com­ing from the south.

Why would a jour­nal­ist call a politi­cian a liar? Why would a politi­cian re­cip­ro­cate? Only these two ego­tis­ti­cal po­lit­i­cal mav­er­icks will ever know. This week with much amaze­ment I lis­tened as Rick Wayne asked for an apol­ogy from Choice TV for a po­lit­i­cal ad that aired on their sta­tion. The Man of Steel was of­fended that a par­tial state­ment was edited and made palat­able, if only to the mealy bugs, with a yel­low liar stamp on it. The nitty gritty of the dis­course was the usual rub­bish where Claudius Fran­cis, pres­i­dent of the St Lu­cia se­nate, and Rick Wayne, jour­nal­ist ex­traor­di­naire, went at it about some Arabs com­ing to St Lu­cia with St Lu­cian pass­ports. Who said what, how, why, where, when, was the same coloured po­lit­i­cal baloney that we have come to ex­pect from Rick and of course from Claudius.

Let’s take a mo­ment to rub the paint off the clown’s face; first to Mr. World. Here’s a man who started off writ­ing against Comp­ton, then turned around and be­came Comp­ton’s press sec­re­tary. Then writ­ing against him, then fight­ing against him. I never got the sense that he was a Ju­lian Hunte pup­pet but he brought his ver­sion of the truth to light right up un­til 1997, fight­ing the torch and all it stood for. In the process this jour­nal­ist, who has un­cov­ered more scan­dals than per­haps any other in the re­gion, made the fa­tal cor­re­spon­dent’s er­ror and re­moved his cloak of ink and went on a po­lit­i­cal plat­form. The rest, as he would say, was pure hypocrisy.

There were umpteen well­writ­ten sto­ries about Kenny Anthony be­ing a com­pas­sion­ate leader, a cel­e­bra­tion of change and a cho­rus well-scripted in red ink; but good things never last. Rick can­not keep quiet. Sorry, I meant Rick can­not be si­lenced. Sorry, spell check. Rick can­not con­form or play ball. He is a jour­nal­ist at heart and a man man­dated by God him­self to tell the truth (if only Rick’s truth). The Kenny/Rick love af­fair ended faster than it started and the two be­came sworn enemies. Al­though I sus­pect be­hind closed doors they have a good laugh at us mere mor­tals. As we moved from the Walk­man phase to the iPod gen­er­a­tion Rick’s at­tacks on Dr. Anthony never slowed. Fun­nily enough, when and if Kenny ever turns the screws on Rick, he does so by re­mote and sub­tly. This time around, the silly - sorry the stupid sea­son (damn spell check again) - prom­ises to pit two men well past their prime at log­ger­heads. One has the Red Army, the other has a Star.

Like a good general the leader of the Labour Party has a le­gion of fol­low­ers, some gram­mat­i­cally-chal­lenged ones like Frank Charles; Ninja Tur­tles like "Ger­mina Hip­polyte.” Then there is the lieu­tenant of in­sult, the low-blow min­is­ter and the sen­a­tor of all that is po­lit­i­cally cor­rect, Dr. honor­able, sir, esquire, Claudius Fran­cis. A man who is never, ever in­cor­rect about any­thing, ever. I am an avid lis­tener to Straight Up; in

fact I try record­ing ev­ery­thing that he says to fact check it and ei­ther I am a lousy re­searcher or Sir Fran­cis has never, ever been wrong about any­thing, ever! I strug­gled to write this sen­tence; one, be­cause I re­al­ize what I just wrote is prob­a­bly a big­ger lie than 100 mil­lion dol­lars im­me­di­ate in­jec­tion. And I strug­gled be­cause I know Mr. Truth is prob­a­bly go­ing to at­tack me the same way he mu­ti­lates Clin­ton Reynolds. But thank­fully mar may­lay bom sec.

I say it serves Rick right that “de party” chose one slip he made over so many truths he has told to la­bel him a yel­low liar.

But Claudius and com­pany, re­mem­ber, do unto oth­ers then run! Since this is the ac­cepted stan­dard from politi­cians to jour­nal­ist I am pleased to in­form that the col­lec­tion of un­truths told by “de party” and the truth mon­gers will be splashed in Un­told Sto­ries fash­ion for the elu­ci­da­tion of the un­de­cided vot­ers.

It is sad, em­bar­rass­ing and down­right dis­gust­ing that af­ter 37 years of self-gover­nance we can­not dis­cuss is­sues for the bet­ter­ment of our coun­try. We wal­low in gut­ter pol­i­tics, chicken, rum and free t-shirts. We swal­low the echoed yel­low and red rhetoric, we stain our fin­gers, we com­plain two years into the next term and we re­peat the cy­cle five years later. Tis the sea­son to think be­fore you dip, St Lu­cia.

"Man of Steel" Rick Wayne.

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