Single vs Settled
What do you do when your friend becomes part of a couple? Does that change the friendship forever? Two readers share their sides of the story.
I’ve been single for a while and I really love my routine and the life I have. I go to the gym or do yoga after work, and I meet up with friends to party on Friday nights. On weekends, when I have the time (and the money), I like to check out new restaurants. Most of my friends are single too, which makes it easy to make plans with them.
I find that my friends who are attached have different priorities. It can get annoying asking them if they’re free to meet, and always have them say no. It means we seldom meet up. I’d never say it to their faces but sometimes, I think they’ve all gotten a little boring. You don’t need to lose your identity just because you’re in a relationship. Sometimes, I think they forget what it’s like to be single and not have to ask someone else for time to do something.” Jolin, 28
I’ve had friends who got into relationships and then disappeared and I’ve always hated that. So when I got married, I swore I wouldn’t do the same thing. But then again, why be with someone if you aren’t going to spend time together?
Since we both work quite late, my husband and I made a promise to do date night every Friday. That means I’m never free on that night but I don’t think it’s a big deal. I admit I sometimes miss having the freedom to decide to go out on impulse, but that wouldn’t be fair to my husband.
I still keep in touch with most of my single girlfriends, but I’ve got a lot more commitments now – like family dinners and birthday parties for relatives. It annoys me that my friends like to plan stuff on Friday nights, and then just because I can’t make it, assume I can’t meet up on weekends either.” Felicia, 31