Got a relationship problem? Our man about town, Jason Godfrey, is here to help.
My boyfriend doesn’t like me Instagramming all the details about our relationship. I don’t get why it bothers him so much. I enjoy sharing and immortalising my favourite memories, like our first anniversary dinner and trips overseas. Why is he acting out, and how do I get him to see things my way?
If a tree falls in a forest but no one is there to post to its Instastory, does it make a noise? The answer is: no, it doesn’t. Social media is great, except when it’s taking your personal data and selling it to other people. But I digress. The point is, some people might not be as happy about cementing their reallife moments on the Internet as you are. Maybe the answer here is a compromise. Let him know you’re posting all this stuff because you’re proud to call him yours, but try to have some moments that are just for the two of you. In your relationship, it’s the two of you that really matter.
My boyfriend and I have been together a year. Things are going well, but I feel we don’t have sexual chemistry. We’ve talked about it, but things haven’t improved. What can I do to make things better? I don’t want to lose our relationship over this.
You need to figure out what the issue is. A year isn’t that long – maybe you’re still a little shy with each other in the sack? Maybe you’re still feeling each other out to see what you are into? Try throwing some props into the mix to break you out of your routine and jump-start the sexual chemistry. It’s worth a shot, because (I hate to be the one to break it to you) if you can’t find any chemistry in the bedroom, the relationship’s probably not going to last much longer.
My boyfriend wants to go on a diving holiday with a close female friend. They’ve been friends for years and she’s married. It doesn’t make sense for me to go as I don’t dive, but I feel uncomfortable about it, and I don’t want to come off as possessive and jealous. Am I overreacting? Is this something I should talk to him about?
Oh, you should definitely say something. And there’s nothing wrong with suggesting that you go along on the trip. There’s no reason you can’t hang out on the boat and enjoy some sun while they dive. In any case, if your boyfriend isn’t on board with the idea, tell him you’ll call his friend’s husband and set up a beach vacation with him. After all, why should the two of you be left at home? I’m pretty sure that’ll change his mind.
I’ve been seeing this guy for about six months, and things seem to be going well. When should we start talking about our relationship history, and how honest do I need to be?
So you’re in a new relationship. Everything is tulips and ice cream and puppy dogs on a sun-drenched beach. You feel you’ve met your soulmate, and that you can reveal everything about yourself to him because he gets you, and of course, you want him to know. But should you?
Sure, I’m all for being honest with your partner about your past. But I mean stuff like cheating on a test once. We can laugh about sins like that. But what might be less funny are your past sexual liaisons. Employ the “Would I want to know this about him?” rule before you to spill the beans. Knowing everything about each other doesn’t make you a stronger couple.
When it comes to your sexual history, I’d say it’s probably better to give him a general overview – but downplay the more pornographic aspects. Oh, and just pray he offers you the same courtesy.
Got a relationship problem? Jason Godfrey, our man about town, is here to help.
Who says you can’t crash your guy’s holiday?