Herworld (Singapore) - - MAKE YOUR MOVE -

Make your pro­file pub­lic

Duh, if your pro­file is private, he’s not go­ing to bother re­ply­ing, be­cause there’s noth­ing for him to check out. And once the two of you have started a con­ver­sa­tion, you can be sure he’ll be tak­ing a closer look at what you post. So amp up the In­stas­to­ries to give him fod­der for con­ver­sa­tion.

Get on his radar

Su­san* sets things up by lik­ing the posts of guys who catch her eye. “It’s the eas­i­est way to bait them – it gets their at­ten­tion first,” she says. She also leaves com­ments, but makes sure they’re not too flirty since they’re pub­lic. By the time she sends her first DM, the guys recog­nise her In­sta­gram han­dle and are more re­cep­tive.

Use the in­tel

Lazy in­tro­duc­tions like “Hi” and “What’s up” won’t cut it if you’re a com­plete stranger. You’ve got all the in­for­ma­tion you need from his pro­file – use it. Ask how the food was at a cafe he was re­cently at. Shared in­ter­ests? That’s a great place to start a con­ver­sa­tion.

Don’t get over-friendly

What to say: “That steak looks amaz­ing! Does it taste as good as it looks?” What not to say: “That steak looks amaz­ing – I would love to share it with you.”

In­sta­gram isn’t a dat­ing site, so don’t come on too strong. It might spook the guy. Keep the sug­ges­tive emo­jis for when you get to know him bet­ter. Annabelle’s* first mes­sage to her now-boyfriend was, “Omg, is that Chris Hemsworth on the MRT??” af­ter see­ing an ac­tor looka­like on his In­sta­gram Story. At that point, she wasn’t think­ing of flirt­ing. Amused, he replied, and they hit it off.

Know your bound­aries

His pro­file may be pub­lic, but if he’s posted a cap­tion say­ing he’s had a rough day, it’s not on you to ask him what hap­pened. That’s for his friends to deal with, not some­one he’s barely spo­ken to on­line. Also skip the com­ments about some­thing he posted back in 2015 – it’ll give him stalker vibes.

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