DON’T BE THAT CREEPY STRANGER WHO SPOOKS HIM:
Make your profile public
Duh, if your profile is private, he’s not going to bother replying, because there’s nothing for him to check out. And once the two of you have started a conversation, you can be sure he’ll be taking a closer look at what you post. So amp up the Instastories to give him fodder for conversation.
Get on his radar
Susan* sets things up by liking the posts of guys who catch her eye. “It’s the easiest way to bait them – it gets their attention first,” she says. She also leaves comments, but makes sure they’re not too flirty since they’re public. By the time she sends her first DM, the guys recognise her Instagram handle and are more receptive.
Use the intel
Lazy introductions like “Hi” and “What’s up” won’t cut it if you’re a complete stranger. You’ve got all the information you need from his profile – use it. Ask how the food was at a cafe he was recently at. Shared interests? That’s a great place to start a conversation.
Don’t get over-friendly
What to say: “That steak looks amazing! Does it taste as good as it looks?” What not to say: “That steak looks amazing – I would love to share it with you.”
Instagram isn’t a dating site, so don’t come on too strong. It might spook the guy. Keep the suggestive emojis for when you get to know him better. Annabelle’s* first message to her now-boyfriend was, “Omg, is that Chris Hemsworth on the MRT??” after seeing an actor lookalike on his Instagram Story. At that point, she wasn’t thinking of flirting. Amused, he replied, and they hit it off.
Know your boundaries
His profile may be public, but if he’s posted a caption saying he’s had a rough day, it’s not on you to ask him what happened. That’s for his friends to deal with, not someone he’s barely spoken to online. Also skip the comments about something he posted back in 2015 – it’ll give him stalker vibes.