1. You and your other half go out for the evening.
This is exceptional. Usually we prefer to stay at home. Your husband usually decides when and where to go. We usually have a date night at the weekend. Nothing out of the ordinary – we’re always together. We had to juggle our diaries to fit each other in. 2. In terms of taste (books, films, music) and ideas (political, cultural, spiritual)…
We’re rather different, and that’s fine.
We each have our own preferences, and it sometimes gives rise to heated discussions between us.
We have little in common and we don’t have meaningful conversations.
We share views on most things.
I end up pandering to my husband’s tastes. 3. When a conflict is brewing in your relationship, you tend to… Let your husband have his own way to avoid an argument. Wait it out. Provoke a blazing row so you can both get things all out in the open. Speak calmly. Blame your husband for causing trouble. 4. How often do you socialise with your friends? Frequently – they often come around. Now and then. We have a few very close friends. We often all go out together. We see our friends separately a lot of the time. Only very occasionally. 5. The words that best summarise the goals of your relationship are… Security and stability. Tenderness and support. Mutual exchange and openness to the world. Motivation and assistance. Comfort and safety. 6. Who in your relationship brings new ideas or suggests adventures? We share these discussions. Usually my husband does. It’s about equal between us. Neither of us. Sometimes it’s me, but mostly it’s my husband. 7. You have to work late and your husband finds there’s not much at home to cook for dinner. He waits for you – you’ll have gone to the supermarket on the way home. He calls to ask what to do. He orders a takeaway. Together, you make a meal out of leftovers in the fridge once you get home. 8. You both eat dinner… Every day at around the same time. At 7.30 pm sharp. Whatever time you both get home from work. Often at the same time. It’s flexible. 9. The plumber has to come round on Wednesday morning. So… You’re the one who has to wait in. Your husband said he couldn’t wait around because of work. Your husband takes the day off, seeing it as an opportunity for a mid-week break. You negotiate according to your diaries. Your husband waits at home. 10. Who makes the decisions about things like finances, holidays, home interiors and weekend activities? You do the home stuff, your husband does the rest. Both of you, after discussing things together. There are no set rules. We decide together, except in certain areas. Every decision is taken by mutual agreement. 11. Your relationship is more like… A nest. A springboard. A castle. A ship. A train.