ANYONE COLLECTING TILL SLIPS?
IT’S a rare event when you open your letterbox and find a real, personal, hand-written letter inside.
What a treat. I turned it over several times, sniffed it and stroked it fondly. Imagine that! An oldfashioned letter. Wow!
Of course it didn’t have a postage stamp on it. The Post Office apparently doesn’t sell stamps any more. It had a little cash register slip stuck on it saying that the sender had paid R4.20 to have it posted.
I wonder whether philatelists still exist and, if so, what do they collect now? Cash register slips? Is there a name for somebody who collects cash register slips?
We probably all know that a dipterist is somebody who collects flies (do you know many dipterists?) and a phillumenist is one who collects matchbox labels and a tegestologist collects beer mats, but I have yet to hear of a name for anybody who collects till slips.
If there are any enthusiastic till slip collectors out there I am perfectly willing to part with some of mine. I have, for example, a rare 2017 slip that contains 500g of butter for only R43.99. That should be worth a bit to a collector. They don’t make till slips like that any more.
I suppose we should be applauding the lack of postage stamps.
The government has promised to reduce unnecessary spending and stamp printing doesn’t come cheaply.
The next organisation to look at is the SABC. Maybe we could do away with all that expensive electronic paraphernalia and re-train the broadcasters to be town criers.
Instead of loafing about sipping coffee in their air-conditioned studios, let them get out there among the people who pay their salaries. Give them a bell and a loudhailer and a space in the market place.
“Hear ye! Hear ye! Be it known that the following officials have been charged with corruption. The following politicians have been arrested for fraud and the following trains will no longer be running as they have been burnt. Now for tomorrow’s weather.”
Next we need to look into SAA. Perhaps we could sell all those expensive gas-guzzling Boeings and replace them with a huge fleet of rickshaws. A rickshaw pilot school could be set up in Durban, where there is already a pool of experienced instructors. One of the benefits of an SAA controlled rickshaw fleet is that there would be a huge reduction in incidents of luggage theft too.
Passengers’ baggage would be kept to a bare minimum and would be conveyed safely on the laps of the passengers. We need to think laterally in these tough economic times.
A wrinkled old man went to the doctor and complained that he was continually tired.
“How old are you?” The doctor asked.
“I’m 91,” said the patient. “And what kind of life have you led?” asked the doc.
“For 80 years I have enjoyed a life of wine, women and song,” the old man bragged.
“Ah, well I think I have some good news for you.” “What’s that?”
“You don’t have to give up singing.”