Siyahleba | The weird world of politics

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Used to the Max

There was a cri­sis in Cape Town this week. It had noth­ing to do with EFF cadres and the woman who slapped their MPs as they were be­ing pushed out of the Na­tional Assem­bly dur­ing the re­cent chaotic state of the na­tion ad­dress.

No, this was a cri­sis of cli­mac­tic pro­por­tions: The City of Cape Town an­nounced that the state-funded flavoured Max con­doms it had been dis­tribut­ing were so pop­u­lar, its clin­ics had run out of stock and the sup­plier could not keep up with de­mand. It urged peo­ple to ab­stain or use the not-so-pop­u­lar Choice con­doms.

It’s hard be­ing a Capeto­nian.

Calamity rules

Siyahleba, with his halt­ing com­mand of the Queen’s lan­guage, is not dis­posed to pok­ing fun at those who sim­i­larly strug­gle. But he was left dumb­founded by deputy chair of the na­tional coun­cil of prov­inces Raser­iti Tau.

Pre­sid­ing over one of this week’s many rowdy sit­tings in the Na­tional Assem­bly, Tau ad­mon­ished MPs thus: “To quote hon­ourable Lindiwe Zulu, we need calamity in the house to al­low us to con­tinue.”

Siyahleba would not put it past the fierce Zulu to come up with such a calami­tous sug­ges­tion to re­store or­der.

Pot­shot politics

These ANC types who take them­selves too se­ri­ously never cease to amaze. While Wed­nes­day was an­other “nor­mal” day in Kim­ber­ley in the North­ern Cape, with the ANC’s thug­gish­ness on dis­play, a so-called com­man­der was more alarmed that a jour­nal­ist man­aged to walk through the gates where party lead­ers were meet­ing.

De­spite ANC mem­bers car­ry­ing pan­gas, ma­chetes, ham­mers and knobker­ries to branch meet­ings, the self-styled com­man­der could not stom­ach the pres­ence of a jour­nal­ist in the vicin­ity. “Chief, I do not know how you got in here,” he said.

Um, we walked through the gate.

MEET MY FRIEND, MAX Deputy Pres­i­dent Cyril Ramaphosa in­tro­duces Max con­doms

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