HE KEEPS COMING BACK
I’m a 50-year-old woman with one son. I dated a guy at school until 1991 when he ended the relationship. I later found another man and became pregnant, but we separated after two years. In 1996 the first guy came back into my life and we dated again until 1998, when he just stopped calling. Once again I gave up on him and moved on with my life. Now he’s back and today we are together. I love this guy but I’m not sure where we are going. What do you think? CONFUSED, SMS The situation you’re in now shows why it’s necessary to find closure in a relationship before moving on to the next one. You’ve left the door open too many times for this man and now he’s taking advantage of you. He does this disappearing act without formally ending your relationship so he can walk in and out of your life as he pleases. But it’s not healthy for you and you shouldn’t allow it. Sit him down and talk about it. He needs to tell you if he’s back permanently or if this is just another phase and he’s likely to disappear again. Don’t allow him to use you – you’re worth more than that.