WOMEN KNOWING THEIR PLACE… Top American television journalist Barbara Walters reported a story on gender roles in Kabul, Afghanistan, several years before the Afghan conflict. She noted that women customarily walked five paces behind their husbands.
Walters recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walk behind their husbands. From her vantage point, despite the overthrow of the oppressive Taliban regime, women now seem to walk even further back behind their husbands and are happy to maintain the old custom.
Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked: “Why do you now seem happy with the old custom that you once tried so desperately to change?”
The woman looked Walters straight in the eyes and, without hesitation, replied: “Landmines.”
Moral of the story: behind every man there’s a smart woman. “ONCE I HAD MULTIPLE personality problems. Now we’re both fine.”
“I used to be indecisive. Today I’m not sure about that.”
“Hypochondria is the only illness I don’t have.” THE SOCIAL WORKER asks a colleague if she’d like to join her for lunch.
Her colleague replies: “I’m sorry, I can’t. I’m on my way to a meeting.”
The social worker says: “That’s all right – the important thing is we talked about it.” A WIFE COMES HOME to find her husband pacing around with a flyswatter. She asks what’s going on.
“Hunting flies,” says the husband. So far I’ve killed three males and two females.”
Slightly intrigued, the wife asks how he can possibly know the difference.
“Three were on the beer can. Two were on the phone.” MURPHY’S LAWS OF SEX: It’s hereditary. If your parents never indulged the odds are you won’t. • Don’t go to bed mad. Stay up and fight. • By the time a wife has finally learned to understand her husband, she’s mostly stopped listening.