On mar­gin

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Finweek English Edition - - PIKER -

Don­ald Trump: All Mex­i­can chick­ens who wish to cross this road must sub­mit to a com­plete back­ground check and a full body search. Hil­lary Clin­ton: What dif­fer­ence at this point does it make why the chicken crossed the road? Bill Clin­ton: I did not cross the road with that chicken. Dr Phil: The prob­lem we have here is that this chicken won’t re­alise that he must first deal with the prob­lem on this side of the road be­fore it goes af­ter the prob­lem on the other side of the road.

What we need to do is help him re­alise how stupid he is act­ing by not tak­ing on his cur­rent prob­lems be­fore adding any new prob­lems. Ernest Hem­ing­way: To die. In the rain. Alone. Martha Ste­wart: No one called me to warn me which way the chicken was go­ing. I had a stand­ing or­der at the Farmer’s Mar­ket to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a cer­tain level. No lit­tle bird gave me any in­sider in­for­ma­tion. Dr Seuss: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with the toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed it I’ve not been told. Aris­to­tle: It is the na­ture of chick­ens to cross the road. Oprah: Well, I understand that the chicken is hav­ing prob­lems, which is why he wants to cross the road so badly. So in­stead of hav­ing the chicken learn from his mis­takes and take falls, which is a part of life, I’m go­ing to give this chicken a NEW CAR so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chick­ens! John Len­non: Imag­ine all the chick­ens in the world cross­ing roads to­gether, in peace. Bill Gates: I have just re­leased e-Chicken2015, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your im­por­tant doc­u­ments and bal­ance your cheque book. In­ter­net Ex­plorer is an in­te­gral part of e-Chicken2015. This new plat­form is much more stable and will never re­boot. Al­bert Ein­stein: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move be­neath the chicken?

Colonel San­ders: Did I miss one?!

“I’m sorry -- our depart­ment has no need for hu­mour.

Have you thought of try­ing the pri­vate sec­tor?”

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