A client asks his adviser, “Where should I invest my money?”
“Put it on booze,” the adviser says. “Where else do you get 40%?” A stockbroker was filling out a job application when he came to the question, “Have you ever been arrested?” He answered “no” to the question. The next question, intended for those who answered the preceding question with a “yes”, was “Why?”
Nevertheless, the stockbroker answered, “Never got caught.” _________________________________________ Two stockbrokers are in a queue in a bank when, suddenly, armed robbers burst in, waving guns and yelling for everyone to freeze.
While several of the robbers take the money from the tellers, others line the customers, including the two stockbrokers, up against a wall and proceed to take their wallets, watches, and other valuables.
While this is going on, one of the stockbrokers jams something into the other stockbroker’s hand.
Without looking down, the second stockbroker whispers: “What is this?”
The first replies: “It’s the $100 I owe you!”