On mar­gin

Finweek English Edition - - Piker -

Ex­cel­lent grand­par­ent­ing

A wo­man in a su­per­mar­ket no­tices a grand­fa­ther and his badly be­haved three-year-old grand­son. It’s ob­vi­ous to her that he has his hands full with the child scream­ing for sweets, bis­cuits, toys... you name it.

Mean­while, the grand­fa­ther is calmly work­ing his way through the shop, say­ing in a con­trolled voice: “Easy, Sean, we won’t be long... easy, boy.”

An­other out­burst and she hears the grandpa calmly say: “It’s okay, Sean, just a few more min­utes and we’ll be out of here. Hang in there, boy.”

At the check­out, the lit­tle ter­ror is throw­ing items out of the cart and the grand­fa­ther again says in a con­trolled voice: “Sean, Sean, re­lax buddy, don’t get up­set. We’ll be home in five min­utes, stay calm, Sean.”

Very im­pressed, the wo­man goes out­side where the grand­fa­ther had loaded the gro­ceries into the car and is now busy wrestling the boy into the car seat.

She says to the el­derly man: “It’s none of my busi­ness, but you were amaz­ing in there. I don’t know how you did it. That whole time you kept your com­po­sure, and no mat­ter how loud and dis­rup­tive he got. Sean is very lucky to have you as his grandpa.”

“Thanks,” says the man, “but I’m Sean. The lit­tle brat’s name is Kevin.”

Si­lence is golden

The kids’ grand­par­ents visit over the hol­i­days and go to church for Christ­mas Mass. Half­way through the ser­vice, the grandpa leans over and whis­pers in his wife’s ear: “I’ve just let out a si­lent fart. What do you think I should do?”

The grandma replies: “Put a new bat­tery in your hear­ing aid.”

In brief

A re­porter was in­ter­view­ing a 103-yearold great-grand­fa­ther: “And what do you think is the best thing about be­ing 103?”

The old man sim­ply replied: “No peer pres­sure.” _________________________________________

Q: How do you break up two blind guys fighting?

A: Yell: “My money’s on the guy with the knife!”

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