The gassy one
Sometimes, you just have to think, ‘Life, you crafty rotter,’ and laugh. One such time is when your gastrointestinal system behaves like a show pony all day – until someone’s head goes between your thighs, then it turns into one of those old carthorses that permanently farts. You alternate between, ‘Wow, this feels good,’ and, ‘gas: clench, clench.’ Even moving to intercourse doesn’t help. According to Dr Rymer, sex and wind are partners in crime. During sex, pressure on the abdomen and rectum gives gas the go signal, then “the involuntary muscle contractions that happen during an orgasm can cause the release of gas,” she adds. Which means we’re basically all passing wind during sex. Reassuring, in a ‘shall we open a window?’ way.