“I tried hon­esty”

Glamour (South Africa) - - Love/Keep It Real -

“In re­la­tion­ships I used to fol­low a mantra of ‘agree to dis­agree’ on ev­ery­thing from pol­i­tics to per­sonal is­sues. But I re­alised those val­ues and be­liefs are es­sen­tial in my re­la­tion­ships and I de­cided to bring them to the fore­front of my con­ver­sa­tions and I look for some­one who is on the same page as me. I even made a list of val­ues and qual­i­ties on which I would not com­pro­mise – like be­ing hon­est, spon­ta­neous, kind, open-minded, self-start­ing and pas­sion­ate.

About the same time I’d matched with a man on Tin­der, and we chat­ted on the app for a cou­ple of months. I was start­ing to get im­pa­tient be­cause he hadn’t asked me on a date, so fi­nally I said, ‘I’m go­ing to delete your num­ber if you don’t ask me out.’ When we went on a date the next day, I made all the plans. We started at a gay bar near my place – what if he didn’t be­lieve in gay mar­riage? My fu­ture child could be gay! And I in­sisted that we split the bill. The date lasted more than six hours and we talked about ev­ery­thing from re­li­gion to abor­tion – on the first date! We’ve now been to­gether for two years and have the most healthy re­la­tion­ship I’ve ever had be­cause of our hon­esty with each other.” – Mered­ith, 24

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