GLAM­OUR list 12 Thoughts every party host has

‘Boyfriend’s friend’s brand new girl­friend is drink­ing frosé. Pink-stain cul­prit lo­cated. Mis­sion: toss com­ments about clean­ing into chats with her for the rest of the night.’

Glamour (South Africa) - - Contents -

12/ List ‘What if no­body comes? What if they do come, and have a ter­ri­ble time? What if they never talk to me again?’ Host­ess stress level: 10/10.

‘The Face­book event page said, “BYOB (and some for me, too).” Who­ever’s got my drink please make your­self known.’

3‘Glazed Brie is all very well, but re­ally, how wrong can cock­tail sausages, car­rot sticks and onion crisps re­ally be?’

4‘Where the heck is my phone? Some­one’s stolen my phone! Oh, no, my phone! Help, any­one seen... Oh, it’s in my pocket.’

5‘Wow, my playlist is hot. Who doesn’t love ’90s Brit­ney? Note to self: check out DJ gigs as a mat­ter of ur­gency.’

68 9‘Where did she get that glass? I put out enough plas­tic cups to build a plas­tic-cup fortress.’

‘Why hasn’t any­one In­sta­grammed my dis­play of fairy lights and ma­son jar cock­tails? That stuff was made for Juno fil­ter.’

11‘Ig­nore the neigh­bours; they’re al­ways park­ing across our drive­way. Now it’s pay­back.’ (Googles ‘noise pol­lu­tion’, just in case.)

12‘If I stay in bed all day to­mor­row, I can pre­tend this un­con­quer­able mess doesn’t ex­ist.’

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