15 signs you’ve lost to your opponent on the first hole.
1 You inform the starter who you’re playing a match against, and he replies: “Is he sick or injured or something?”
2 The starter then looks you up and down and hands your opponent’s caddie a R100 note.
3 When you suggest a “fun” wager for something other than money, your opponent replies: “Sure. Own a boat?”
4 When you point out that he has only 11 clubs in his bag, he replies: “I’m good.”
5 He keeps making practice swings left-handed, but his clubs are right-handed.
6 You look in his bag and see an iron with “0” stamped on the head.
7 His empty scorecard circles. is pre-set with
8 There’s shirt collar. a Net-Jets logo on his
9 A kid asks your opponent to autograph his hat.
10 Before you reach for your driver, he says: “Press.”
11 While waiting for you to play, he’s buffing calluses on his hands with a pumice stone.
12 There’s a plaque in the fairway commemorating his albatross – from last week.
13 You overhear his caddie say: “It’s 227 and a half metres to the front and 256 and a third to the pin.”
14 He asks his caddie to pull the pin... from the fairway.
15 He grabs his putter from a pool-cue case and assembles it.