THE RUN­DOWN

15 signs you’ve lost to your op­po­nent on the first hole.

Golf Digest (South Africa) - - Contents 2/ 15 - – RON KASPRISKE

1 You in­form the starter who you’re play­ing a match against, and he replies: “Is he sick or in­jured or some­thing?”

2 The starter then looks you up and down and hands your op­po­nent’s cad­die a R100 note.

3 When you sug­gest a “fun” wa­ger for some­thing other than money, your op­po­nent replies: “Sure. Own a boat?”

4 When you point out that he has only 11 clubs in his bag, he replies: “I’m good.”

5 He keeps mak­ing prac­tice swings left-handed, but his clubs are right-handed.

6 You look in his bag and see an iron with “0” stamped on the head.

7 His empty score­card cir­cles. is pre-set with

8 There’s shirt col­lar. a Net-Jets logo on his

9 A kid asks your op­po­nent to au­to­graph his hat.

10 Be­fore you reach for your driver, he says: “Press.”

11 While wait­ing for you to play, he’s buff­ing cal­luses on his hands with a pumice stone.

12 There’s a plaque in the fair­way com­mem­o­rat­ing his al­ba­tross – from last week.

13 You over­hear his cad­die say: “It’s 227 and a half me­tres to the front and 256 and a third to the pin.”

14 He asks his cad­die to pull the pin... from the fair­way.

15 He grabs his put­ter from a pool-cue case and as­sem­bles it.

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