My Cad­die, My Boyfriend: Why We Had to Break Up

Just one drama on the LPGA Tour

Golf Digest (South Africa) - - The Golf Life -

e have just about ev­ery per­mu­ta­tion out here: play­ers dat­ing play­ers, play­ers dat­ing their cad­dies, play­ers dat­ing the cad­dies of other play­ers, cad­dies dat­ing each other. There’s al­most al­ways some sort of drama un­fold­ing, but it’s not like it’s a swingers’ scene. Most of us are sim­ply look­ing for quiet nights so we can wake up feel­ing good and per­form.

Beatriz Re­cari has her boyfriend cad­dieing for her. Christina Kim dates Suzann

WPet­tersen’s cad­die. There’s a re­cent ma­jor cham­pion dat­ing an Amer­i­can player who’s barely hold­ing onto her card, and they’re al­ways on-again and off-again.

When I first started play­ing LPGA Tour events, my boyfriend cad­died for me.We’d met in col­lege and were pretty se­ri­ous. Our par­ents had met sev­eral times. It felt re­ally fun to be set­ting out to­gether in life. Fly­ing to new coun­tries, stay­ing in ho­tels, din­ing in restau­rants, go­ing to per­fect golf cour­ses – shar­ing all this to­gether was a thrill.When I wasn’t prac­tis­ing, we’d see movies or find lo­cal parks to go hik­ing. And when you’re driv­ing through the mid­dle of nowhere with a dead cell­phone, it’s re­ally nice hav­ing a com­pan­ion. J was a fun trav­eller.

As for golf, he was re­ally good at dis­tances and read­ing greens.We pretty much al­ways agreed, and if I ever wasn’t sure, he was usu­ally right. He’d played on the men’s team in col­lege, and our squads would some­times prac­tice to­gether. That’s how we met. The first time he asked me out, we were hit­ting bunker shots.We played a game, and the bet was a date, and he barely beat me. Maybe I let him win.

In com­pe­ti­tion, when­ever I would get into trou­ble and start freak­ing a lit­tle, J was a calm pres­ence to bring me back down. He’d make a lit­tle joke to get me to smile and move on to the next shot.

It’s hard to say ex­actly when it hap­pened, but there was a shift. He started get­ting more crit­i­cal. I’d hit the club I wanted to, and if I missed the shot he’d get on me. Like al­most yelling. He’d al­ways been a set of eyes for my swing – I used to help him with his swing, too – but some­how our range ses­sions turned into full-on lessons. Golf be­came re­ally hard. We’d miss cuts and not talk to each other for a whole flight.

I wasn’t re­ally pay­ing J any­thing, but we’d agreed that af­ter I paid back my par­ents and some friends of theirs, what­ever re­mained would be ours. We wanted to be a true team. I liked the idea of all this, but it was stress­ful hav­ing both our for­tunes tied up in how well I hit the golf ball. And I think it was hard for J to be so out of con­trol of his destiny.

If he hadn’t cad­died for me, had in­stead used his de­gree to get a real job while I turned pro, would we have lasted? Who knows? All I can say is that for me, tour­na­ment golf is not some­thing I want to ever ex­pe­ri­ence again with a per­son I love. Ev­ery cad­die re­la­tion­ship I’ve had since has been strictly pro­fes­sional, and I fi­nally broke through for my first win.

I’ve been in groups where the other two play­ers were ro­man­ti­cally in­volved. It’s very in­ter­est­ing. Usu­ally, you can sense they’re go­ing out of the way not to in­ter­act, walk­ing on op­po­site sides of the fair­way and look­ing away when the other putts.And if a sit­u­a­tion re­quires them to speak, they’ll be overly po­lite. I sup­pose this makes sense, us­ing a clear man­ner to di­vide the pro­fes­sional from the per­sonal, but it’s not for me. Golf’s stress­ful enough as is. – WITH MAX ADLER

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from South Africa

© PressReader. All rights reserved.