Move! - - EDITOR’S NOTE -

FAM­ILY is sup­posed to be the cen­tre that holds ev­ery­thing to­gether. When you are in doubt, pain or fall­ing apart be­cause of the pres­sures of life, fam­ily mem­bers should be the first people you turn to. But the reality is that some fam­ily mem­bers are the first to make a cir­cus out of your prob­lems. In­stead of be­ing a shoul­der to cry on, they turn their backs on you when you need them the most. In­stead of un­der­stand­ing, they be­come judge­men­tal. This brings me to the most im­por­tant ques­tion: who should you share your prob­lems with be­cause bot­tling them up just makes mat­ters worse? I have a friend who found out that her hus­band had two chil­dren out of wed­lock, three years into their mar­riage. When she found out about this, she fell apart and sought sup­port from fam­ily mem­bers. They com­forted her but be­fore she knew it, she was the talk of town. People in her neigh­bour­hood knew in­ti­mate de­tails about her hus­band’s af­fairs and how her mar­riage was fall­ing apart. I told my friend that clearly some­one in her fam­ily pre­tended to care but they couldn’t wait to share her mis­ery with the rest of the neigh­bour­hood. It’s usu­ally the people you trust the most who be­tray you. Ev­ery fam­ily has its own fair share of prob­lems but re­joic­ing in a fam­ily mem­ber’s mis­for­tune is in­sen­si­tive and cruel.

Have you ever no­ticed that in most cases wed­dings, tomb­stone un­veil­ings or fu­ner­als don’t al­ways end in peace? There is al­ways that aunt who starts a fight and will dig the X-files, even when the set­ting doesn’t al­low for that kind of be­haviour. Per­son­ally, I have a cousin like that who doesn’t know when to stop and is al­ways look­ing for a fight. They say you can’t choose fam­ily but I have made a de­ci­sion to cut off some fam­ily mem­bers be­cause they don’t want to see you suc­ceed in life. In­stead are con­stantly look­ing for faults so that they can bring you down. For those who are sick and tired of be­ing pulled down by their fam­ily mem­bers, re­mem­ber it has noth­ing to do with you. They are the

Nonzwi prob­lem so for­get them and live your best life. Take care and un­til next week!

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