When you think you’re BIG DOWN THERE

Don’t let the per­ceived size of your pri­vate part to lead to sex­ual in­se­cu­ri­ties

Move! - - YOUR SEX - By Mpho Moagi

LET’S face it. A lot of women have a com­pli­cated re­la­tion­ship with their pri­vate parts. We think they’re smelly and that they look ugly. When it comes to sex and pen­e­tra­tion, we of­ten want it to be small and tight, and won­der if it is too big.

When we judge it to be too big, it starts influencing how we feel about that im­por­tant part of our body and re­late to it with shame, com­plain­ing that it can’t hold him in, that it slips and slides and that it is, if not al­ready, the cause of all our sex­ual frus­tra­tions.


Wor­ry­ing about size is un­der­stand­able, af­ter all ‘am I too big or too small’ is one of the fre­quently asked ques­tions about our sex or­gans. But we’re not just se­cretly won­der­ing if we are too big down there. We are tak­ing steps that con­firm that we think we are big and big is not sex­u­ally at­trac­tive – at least if the pop­u­lar­ity to vagino­plasty (an op­er­a­tion to tighten the vagina) is any­thing to by.

Vagino­plasty is the col­lec­tive name of cos­metic vagina pro­ce­dures that in­clude the re­con­struc­tion, re­ju­ve­na­tion and tight­en­ing of the vagina. An­other point to con­sider is the pop­u­lar­ity of muthi that claims to tighten a so-called loose vagina.


There is a long stand­ing per­cep­tion that if your vagina is loose, then you are a busy body who has slept with a lot of men. But this is not the case. A vagina can be­come big for var­i­ous rea­sons. Chief among them is child birth. When giv­ing birth the vagina stretches to al­low the baby to come out. This can lead to the tear­ing of the skin be­tween the vagina and the anus.

Ac­cord­ing to Dr Suzy El­neil, a con­sul­tant in urog­y­nae­col­ogy, “The vagina can feel loose, softer and more ‘open’. It may also look and feel bruised or swollen. This is nor­mal, and the swelling and open­ness should start to re­duce a few days af­ter your baby is born.”

If you are wor­ried about it be­ing loose, try do­ing pelvic ex­er­cises. They can be done any where, and while you are stand­ing or sit­ting.


Squeeze and draw in your anus at the same time, and close up and draw your vagina up­wards.

Start quickly, tight­en­ing and re­al­is­ing the mus­cles im­me­di­ately. Change pace and go slow while hold­ing the con­trac­tions for 10 sec­onds. It’s rec­om­mend that you re­peat the ex­er­cise 10 times for up to four or six times daily.


An­other rea­son for the vagina to feel loose or big is that when it is aroused, it be­comes lu­bri­cated to al­low pen­e­tra­tion. Like men, blood flows to our sex or­gans when we are aroused. But un­like men, women get wet in­stead of get­ting hard, and get wet­ter dur­ing sex. If you are wor­ried about your pri­vate part be­ing loose: Do it with the man on top. The aim is to get him to lift him­self up once he is in­side you, you close your legs so you thighs squeeze his manhood.


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