Wait on God and let the Holy Spirit guide you to your life-long part­ner

Move! - - CONTENTS - Are you a pas­tor and would you like to write for us? Get in touch with Zenoyise at zenoyise.john@me­ By Rev­erend Si­fiso Ng­cobo

SRev­erend Si­fiso Ng­cobo is a pas­tor at Change Bi­ble Church based in Rood­e­port, west of Joburg. He is also a mar­riage coun­sel­lor and reg­u­lar speaker at re­la­tion­ship sem­i­nars and con­fer­ences. He can be con­tacted on cbcrood­e­ OCIETY and re­li­gions have var­i­ous rites of pas­sages you must suc­cess­fully com­plete in or­der to be recog­nised as ma­ture and re­spon­si­ble. In Western so­ci­ety, dat­ing is one of these rites of pas­sages and the term comes from the idea of set­ting a date where two or more peo­ple agree to get to­gether at a cer­tain time and place for re­cre­ation and fel­low­ship.


Dat­ing is com­mon in so­ci­ety, how­ever, it is not the pre­ferred norm for Chris­tians. While the Bi­ble doesn’t speak of dat­ing, there are im­por­tant prin­ci­ples Chris­tians can ob­serve.

One of the pit­falls of dat­ing is be­com­ing in­volved with some­one emo­tion­ally and phys­i­cally too quickly, lead­ing to in­ap­pro­pri­ate be­hav­iour such as pre­mar­i­tal sex, which the Bi­ble is against. Healthy re­la­tion­ships should al­ways be­gin at a spir­i­tual and in­tel­lec­tual level. The phys­i­cal di­men­sion is the least im­por­tant, yet this is where many peo­ple usu­ally start.

Fall­ing in love is a well-thought out de­ci­sion which is not in­flu­enced by emo­tions, but by what I call “a well de­cided-de­ci­sion”.


So­ci­ety looks down on sin­gle peo­ple, with the church some­times fall­ing into the trap of un­der­min­ing them as in­ad­e­quate or in­com­plete.

Be­fore God brought Eve to Adam, he was alone, yet not lonely. There is a dif­fer­ence be­tween be­ing alone and be­ing lonely. Lone­li­ness is an in­di­ca­tion of a mis­er­able in­di­vid­ual.

In 1 Corinthi­ans 7:26-35, Paul ex­plains that an un­mar­ried per­son is con­cerned with the Lord’s af­fairs, while a mar­ried per­son is con­cerned with pleas­ing their spouse. Like Adam, let your part­ner find you oc­cu­pied with the Lord’s af­fairs, pre­par­ing your­self for who­ever God has pre­pared for you.


Mar­riage is a for­mal re­la­tion­ship and life­time covenant cre­ated by God be­tween man and woman.

We are spirit-led be­ings and two souls marry spir­i­tu­ally be­fore they marry phys­i­cally. That is why most peo­ple know whether some­one is the right one be­fore they ap­proach them be­cause the Holy Spirit must have con­victed them in choos­ing a life­time part­ner.

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