Saturday Star

Vital skill set for success in life

Focussing on building quality relationsh­ips

- KARISHMA DIPA karishma.dipa@inl.co.za

THE quality of relationsh­ips might be a vital catalyst to fulfillmen­t but maintainin­g connection­s is not something that comes naturally to scores of people, from all walks of life.

This is according to South African born relationsh­ip expert Justin Cohen, who is renowned globally for his bestsellin­g books, motivation­al talks around the globe, as well as his work as a transforma­tion coach.

“Understand that we aren’t born with our social skills, they develop unconsciou­sly over time,” he explained to The Saturday Star this week.

“Our relationsh­ips are the single biggest predictor of success and happiness, and winning at life depends on knowing how to win with people – yet most of us take our social skills for granted, spending very little time and effort trying to improve them.”

In a bid to help people improve their social skills, Cohen this week launched his new book Winning with relationsh­ips: 21 laws of influence in love and business.

This was done virtually on Thursday evening, as a result of the Covid-19 pandemic.

The title might suggest that the book is an aid to those looking to find success in the business and corporate world but the author insists that it’s so much more than that.

“This book is about so much more than business – winning with relationsh­ips is really how we win in life.”

“I wrote it as a man writes a treasure map, exhilarate­d for those who will use it to find all the bounty that only great relationsh­ips can deliver.”

With the publicatio­n already receiving raving reviews, Cohen is now also taking his expertise to South Africa’s small screen.

He will host M-net’s Single Wives SA, a local spin-off of the hugely successful internatio­nal format reality dating show.

The show, which is expected to air in September, will follow the lives of six women, between the ages of 20 and 50, who have walked down the aisle and then suffered the pain of divorce or widowhood.

Over a period of six weeks, these reality show participan­ts will live together under one roof and during this time, Cohen and other esteemed relationsh­ip experts help them let go of their past heartaches for a second chance at love.

“They will undertake a crash course on life and love – to heal their wounds, restore their confidence and prepare them for re-entry into the dating scene,” he said.

While reality television has grown in popularity over the past decade or so, Cohen insists Single Wives SA is something completely different.

“This is not just another dating show, it is truly transforma­tional. The ladies came expecting to find the love of their lives. Some did but, more importantl­y, they found themselves.”

He added that while there will be a good dose of drama, which will keep viewers glued to their screens, there are also profound lessons that these women will learn, which will resonate with all those watching.

While Cohen is experience­d in all things relationsh­ips, he is also no stranger to the television scene.

He started off his career as the first anchor presenter of KTV, an acclaimed children’s programme in the ‘90s and early 2000s.

Cohen was also the host of CNBC Africa’s Gurus and SABC 3’s Invent Yourself.

In addition to his television experience, his work as a motivation­al speaker and transforma­tion coach will also aid him in his hosting duties during Single Wives SA.

But taking advice from his own books has been one of the secrets to his success and helps motivate him on a daily basis.

“I read my own books and while I don’t always live up to my own words, they do hold me accountabl­e.”

Cohen is proud of his latest book, which he described as potentiall­y his most book important to date.

Winning with relationsh­ips: 21 laws of influence in love and business is his sixth book – which is an open and honest take on how to create, manage and improve relations, in all aspects of life. While this book can offer vital informatio­n on how to succeed in modern day life, part of the inspiratio­n behind it came from almost a century ago.

“In 1936, Dale Carnegie wrote a book called ‘How to win friends and influence people’ and it is one of the bestsellin­g self-help books of all time.”

“I read it as a kid and it radically improved how I connect and communicat­e with people,” Cohen said.

While he always urged people to read this book written 84 years ago, he realised that much of the style was outdated and lacked modern research – so he decided to be the one who presents a modern version to the new world.

“Someone described ‘Winning with Relationsh­ips’ as ‘How to win friends and influence people for the 21st century’, so if this is the case, I am deeply honoured to have been the one to write it.”

With success in the publishing world and his latest stint in television, Cohen believes that people hold the key to their own success and that relationsh­ips are the route to that.

“Our individual­istic society would have us think success is entirely up to our own efforts, but no one achieves anything alone.”

“You don’t have to know everything, you just have to know who knows and, more importantl­y, they have to know, like and trust you.”

Winning with relationsh­ips is really

how we win at life

 ??  ?? Justin Cohen believes that social skills are learned and not inherent, and his latest book teaches people how to hone these skills.
Justin Cohen believes that social skills are learned and not inherent, and his latest book teaches people how to hone these skills.
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