BEGGAR, FOR WORSE
Couples use crowdfunding to pay for weddings
● Parliamentary police officer Mario Tieras dreams of a R150 000 wedding surrounded by at least 100 guests, an after-party and a week-long honeymoon in the Maldives — and he wants you to pay for it.
Tieras, 32, and his 39-year-old fiancée, Lydia van Wyk, are one of many South African couples who have turned to the generosity of strangers on the worldwide web to pay for their big day.
“Sometimes you need a little help to plan your dream wedding, your dream business, your dream event. In my case it is my dream wedding day.
“So I would say I can go cheap, but would that make me happy? If I go cheap, would my partner feel special, and would I be satisfied? Because this is a once in a lifetime event and it’s my very first wedding so it should be special and my partner should feel special and she should be happy. So to ask for help to make my day special, I guess it won’t harm anybody,” said the constable, who is from Ceres in the Western Cape.
On his campaign profile on gogetfunding.com, Tieras asks for R200 000R150 000 for the wedding and R50 000 for the honeymoon. He plans to contribute R30 000 from his own pocket.
On Thursday he received R58 000 from two unknown donors.
The trend of crowdfunding for weddings is fairly new in South Africa as opposed to the US and UK where, over the years, some have said it’s fine to “beg” for funds while others have said it’s tacky.
In both countries, people even crowdfund to pay for funerals.
Tieras has not received any negative feedback from friends and family.
“Many of my colleagues want to contribute towards my wedding. My family have a positive attitude towards this crowdfunding and some of them even said they would contribute other contents like meat, juice, tables and chairs,” he said.
If the couple do not meet their target for their wedding in June, they will cut the guest list or cancel the honeymoon.
Cape Town couple Martea Roos and Marcel Steenkamp want a simple wedding with 75 guests in October but still need R18 000 in donations.
The couple are offering donors’ names on an origami animal, or on a plant behind the bridal table if they pledge R12.
A photo with a donor’s name on it on the wedding day can be arranged for a R118 donation. A personalised thankyou video shot on the big day is going for R236.
“The cheapest venue is R15 000 and for some people that is a month’s salary. We have saved R30 000 and we need R18 000 because we don’t want to skimp on food. We don’t want the bells and whistles but we want a wedding,” said Roos.
“It is difficult these days to pay for a wedding and some don’t want to go to court to get married. Some people want to have their friends and family together at their wedding. If you want that wedding and want strangers to donate money, then go for it,” she said.
Other South African couples used crowdfunding and fundraising platform BackaBuddy to raise funds for charity and causes on their wedding day instead of receiving gifts.
Anil and Pooja Mananyetso have pledged that their wedding day will raise more than R12 000 for the Smile Foundation. Mike and Danielle Silver used their big day to donate close to R52 000 for the Ikamva Lisezandleni Zethu Youth. Rowan and Stephany Brewer’s walk down the aisle raised R23 000 for the Alexandra Education Committee.
BackaBuddy spokesman Zane Groenewald said: “If you were thinking about crowdfunding for your wedding, you should take your family and friends into consideration, as individual campaigns of this kind will receive majority of their funds from those closest to the couple.”
The Southern Africa Institute of Fundraising’s national president, Melanie Jackson, said the customary understanding of charitable giving was support for someone who was considerably less fortunate and in need of help to sustain themselves.
“Crowdfunding allows for every kind of cause, with the sublime to the ridiculous receiving equal airspace.
“Donors, fatigued by many years of sad stories, are perhaps turning away from all the pictures of unhappy, grubby children to pull at the heartstrings and opting to support something fun – dare we say, frivolous — instead.”
She said the non-profit sector, which could never dictate to people about the causes they supported, should look to tap into “the crowdfunding enthusiasm for finding funding happiness.”