Feast of rugby ahead
IT’S the Sharks tonight on the surface of Mars, er, the Griquas rugby field at Kimberley, and the Boks tomorrow in the Land of the Long White Underpants.
A feast of rugby lies ahead, and the gals of the Street Shelter for the Over-Forties are already adjusting their knickers. Nothing untoward, of course – it’s just that they supply the elastic for a fashioning of catapults for the traditional celebratory feu de joie in the event of a rugby victory, when the street lights are shot out.
The Sharks should provide the first fusillade tonight – but take nothing for granted. Those Griquas are tough nuts, they’ve been hurting and they’re on their flinty home ground. Our guys need to hou kop and hou koers.
Tomorrow in the Land of the Long White Undershirt? That’s the iffy one. The Boks had been surging, but last Saturday constipation took hold in the first half against the Van Diemenslanders, then in the second, where we whupped them, all we could manage was the draw, which is like kissing your cousin. Something’s amiss, they’re not yet the full 10 bob.
But, again, in rugby take nothing for granted. Success against the All Blacks, and the Street Shelter will be a blizzard of knickers.
Olé, olé, olé!
That’s Drambuie!
THE Royal Edinburgh Tattoo has run its course with participation this year by a local figure. Lorne Maclaine, who lives in Kloof, for years played wicketkeeper for the Durban Press XI and was marketing manager of this newspaper group. He’s chief of his clan and has the title The Maclaine of Lochbuie (we call him Drambuie).
The Maclaine and Kincaid clans were honoured in Edinburgh this year. Lochbuie led a march on to the Edinburgh Castle esplanade, leading a Maclaine Clan Retinue drawn from 11 different countries, including his own immediate family, before a crowd of 9 000.
The Tattoo this year also featured the Royal Marines Massed Bands, the Melville Schools Choir, the massed pipes and drums of the Royal Regiment of Scotland, the Indian Navy Band, the Fanfare Band of The 9th French Infantry Brigade, the Shetland Fiddlers, the Viking Jarl Squad, the Tattoo Dance Company, the Japanese Ground Self-Defence Force Central Band – with a battle between two Samurai warriors – the US Naval Forces Europe Band, the Queen’s Colour Squadron and the Band Of The Royal Air Force Regiment.
Then, finally, the emotional high point of the Lone Piper, caught in a spotlight as he plays from the ramparts of Edinburgh Castle.
Hoot mon! Time for a dram!
Petrol septet
WE’VE heard of a barbershop quartet but this was a petrol station septet. Patrick Coyne, of the Retired Teachers’ and Friends’ Choir, brings us the story.
Choir member Geoff Parkes was filling up at the Shell garage in Florida Road. While this was being done he glanced at the music for one of the choir’s songs, Ukuthula. Pointing to the title he asked the pumphand if he knew what it meant in English.
“Oh yes, it means ‘quietness’ or ‘peace’.” Then Geoff began singing: Ukuthula, kulo mhlaba wezono
Aleluya igazi likaJesu linyenyez’ ukuthula…
The pumphand joined in. He knew the words. Then the other petrol attendants drifted across and joined in also, four of them singing along with Geoff.
“They knew the words, hit the right notes, and harmonised effortlessly.
“At the same time a petrol tanker was waiting to offload its fuel. The tanker driver and his mate heard what was going on, and they also came and sang along.
“This was just before the petrol price was due to go up, so a line of customers’ cars was forming near the petrol pumps. When Geoff ’s seven-strong impromptu choir finished their performance, all the drivers in their cars clapped and cheered.”
Patrick says the choir is always looking for new members, especially those who, like those petrol attendants, blend and harmonise. Anyone interested can contact him at 031 572 3077 or voicepi@mweb.co.za
Tailpiece
CRUISE passenger to Purser: “I wish to complain. I went to my cabin and found a common seaman using my shower.”
Purser: “In second class who do you expect? The captain?”
Last word
THERE is no nonsense so gross that society will not, at some time, make a doctrine of it and defend it with every weapon of communal stupidity. – Robertson Davies