Twick­ers has a new pub

The Mercury - - METRO - KIN HUB­BARD

A NEW pub has opened at Twick­en­ham – but it’s dif­fi­cult to find. It’s called Far­rell’s Arms.

The rugby world still stands as­ton­ished at Eng­land skip­per Owen Far­rell’s arm­less shoul­der charge at Bok cen­tre ‘An­dré Ester­huizen in the dy­ing sec­onds of last Sat­ur­day’s Test; that a penalty was not awarded; that Far­rell has not been cited and will take the field against New Zea­land to­mor­row; and that ref­eree An­gus Gard­ner gets off un­scathed.

Had the penalty been awarded, Han­dré Pol­lard would prob­a­bly have goaled it, giv­ing the Boks vic­tory. He might, on the other hand, have found touch in the cor­ner.

The re­sult­ing line-out could have seen the Boks set up a driv­ing maul to score a try, giv­ing Pol­lard an op­por­tu­nity to con­vert and make the vic­tory all the more em­phatic.

But, as the philoso­pher said, if my aun­tie had go­nads she’d be my un­cle.

France to­mor­row. All the Boks need is two halves the way they played the first against Eng­land. Mal­colm Marx needs to get those line-out throws right, oth­er­wise peo­ple will start call­ing him Grou­cho.

‘Erewego, ’erewego, ’erewego!

DUR­BAN’S mu­si­cians are putting on a gig to sup­port the fa­mous Bluff Cat Lady, who’s been feed­ing and car­ing for fe­lines for the past 40 years.

Ac­cord­ing to my old muso mate Smelly Fel­lows, Cat Lady Jean feeds 69 a day – 36 in her shel­ter, 20 feral cats along the Bluff beaches, eight at the squat­ter camps at the end of Brighton Beach and next to the dump, and five at the Went­worth Hos­pi­tal crèche.

The food costs be­tween R2 000 and R3 000 a month – pel­lets, mince, rice and tinned food.

“Jean re­lies on do­na­tions from the pub­lic. She works alone col­lect­ing food, feed­ing cats, and ar­rang­ing ve­teri­nary treat­ment where she can,” says Smelly.

“She also runs a book stall at Bux­ton Vil­lage Cen­tre ev­ery Sat­ur­day morn­ing. To help Jean with her costs we’re hold­ing a fund-raiser at Fynn­land Sports Club, Smith Drive, Fynn­land, on Sun­day, De­cem­ber 2.”

En­ter­tain­ment will be pro­vided by the GPS Choice duo, Mark Hunt, Os­car Swan­lund, Glen Win­ter and other mu­si­cians who still have to con­firm their avail­abil­ity.

The mu­si­cians will per­form free of charge. Donated items will be raf­fled. A jump­ing cas­tle will be set up for kids.

Glenys Theron will be there to do face-paint­ing, a ma­jor part of her in­come go­ing to the fund-raiser.

En­try is free but do­na­tions are wel­come. To book a ta­ble, phone Fynn­land Sports Club on 031 466 2010.

For more info, call 078 264 9475.

DUR­BAN poet Sarita Mathur (who hails orig­i­nally from In­dia) pro­duces a paean of praise for her adopted city. Dur­ban,

Dream des­ti­na­tion,

No other city beats

Its beauty,

Cli­mate,

Cul­ture, food

And di­ver­sity.

A city like no other.

Dur­ban –

The place to be.

In­spir­ing artists,

Po­ets,

Food­ies too.

Dur­ban,

Ev­ery­one loves you.

Tail­piece

AR­CHAE­OL­O­GISTS in the Mid­dle East have de­cided that a 3 000-year-old mummy died of heart fail­ure. Rea­son? They’ve de­ci­phered a parch­ment found in the mummy’s hand.

It read: “5 000 shekels on Go­liath.”

Last word

HON­ESTY pays, but it doesn’t seem to pay enough to suit some peo­ple. |

Gra­ham.lin­scott@inl.co.za

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