What Zulu women want, at least on wheels

The Witness - Wheels - - MOTORING - FA NYAWO

EV­ERY woman suf­fers from what I call deci-pho­bia — the fear of making the wrong de­ci­sion.

Deci-pho­bia is what makes us take so long to reach a de­ci­sion on most top­ics, but es­pe­cially cars, since most women know close to noth­ing about things on wheels.

This is frus­trat­ing car man­u­fac­tur­ers to no end, as they would like to make the ideal “fe­male” car for us women, who com­prise at least half of the buy­ers on roads to­day. In the hope of at least get­ting a short list of what Zulu women want from their cars, I rang up friends and fam­ily of dif­fer­ent ages.

Here’s their wish­list — and it’s a good one for any car buyer out there.

When look­ing for a car most Zulu women con­sider fuel ef­fi­ciency, and this is no sur­prise since it’s known that women are big on saving!

Sur­pris­ingly a lot of women would be most likely to buy a mini­van be­cause of its car­rier ca­pac­ity, yes size does mat­ter!

My Zulu women are also very big on the car’s speed, and that is ob­vi­ously due to the fact that we are al­most al­ways in a rush.

If given a chance to pimp our wheels we would pimp the body, be­cause we want our cars to be as ap­peal­ing and at­trac­tive as their own­ers — af­ter all, “You are what you drive!”

Ac­cord­ing to Zulu women, a car fea­ture that is to die for is ad­justable ped­als to make driv­ing easy when driv­ing with Louboutins, be­cause hav­ing to take our pre­cious ba­bies off ev­ery time we get be­hind the wheel is kind of de­press­ing.

An­other sur­prise was the num­ber of the ladies I spoke to who pre­fer Audi above other mar­ques, “be­cause it looks and feels classy”.

Oh, and those sexy “eyes”, thanks to those LEDs that look like flashy eye­liner.

So from the in­for­ma­tion above we can con­clude Zulu women want all the usual things that make a de­sir­able car — good consumption, com­fort, lux­ury and ef­fi­ciency — but if Audi de­sign­ers ever make a combi, if will be a big sell in Richards Bay.

It can even look a lit­tle retro, like the DKW panel van made in the 1950s, that one of Audi’s me­chan­ics re­stored and put back on the road in Jan­uary this year.

It was called the Sch­nel­laster Kas­ten­wa­gen, or Rapid Tran­sit Panel Van, and had a puny 896 cc two-stroke three-cylin­der en­gine.

But just to show how the wheel turns, DKW had also made sev­eral fully-elec­tric ver­sions of the Sch­nel­laster Kas­ten­wa­gen.


One of only two fully elec­tric Sch­nel­laster Kas­ten­wa­gen that Audi’s me­chan­ics had re­stored ear­lier this year. Add some LED lights, and Zulu ladies might just buy this Audi combi.

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