Confessions of a sex addict: ‘I’m on my way to recovery’
‘I WANT a normal life and I’m willing to do anything to earn the respect of my community.’
After spending months in a rehabilitation centre for sex addicts, brave Malume (37) is not only starting over, but is on the way to recovery.
In October last year Malume confessed to the Zululand Observer on how his sex addiction and compulsive behaviour ruined his family and career.
He said sex images occupied his brain almost every minute of the day.
He would propose love to his colleagues and even requested sexual favours from them.
Not only did his actions put him in hot water with his superiors, but his colleagues also started avoiding him.
His behaviour eventually lost him his job, friends and respect.
‘When I was young I used to be shy and couldn’t talk to girls. My friends used to be out there and had girlfriends very early. I didn’t understand anything about sex until I was 17 years old,’
‘Before having my first sexual experience, I had already developed fantasies in my head and sex became an obsession.
‘I thought it would fade away, but as I grew older the obsession became more intense and I started visiting porn sites hourly.
‘I spent hundreds of precious hours of my life going from one image to the next and I was addicted to it,’ Malume said during his first interview.
Malume, when he started working in his early 20s, he used all his money to lure girls to his bed and making all his fantasies a reality.
The main aim for his disclosure was his desperate search for help to fight his obsession.
Through the help of the ZO, which pointed him in the right direction, Malume checked himself into a rehabilitation facility.
‘The first week was so terrible that I wished I could die. They took away anything which could trigger my obsession, including my cellphone, laptop and magazines.
‘While I was there, I did some soulsearching and realised I had been on the wrong path for years.’
While in rehabilitation Malume was diagnosed with Hypersexuality Disorder.
With the help of counsellors and the centre’s psychologists, Malume received treatment which lowered his sex drive.
‘It’s not easy, but I’m willing to put in the work. I am taking it one day at the time.
‘I still have sexual thoughts, but I have learned to counter it with reading or drawing. At least I can now control my thoughts and will continue to fight. I want a normal life,’ said Malume