Always with a smile, she personified joy for life
A smile that lit up her entire face. Eyes shining with love and empathy. A wonderful sense of humour. Infectious laughter that never mocked but was often turned on herself. Innocent jokes that lifted the gloomiest spirit. A passion for everything she did. A hundred percent commitment to any task she undertook. As a counsellor she was always willing to listen patiently, and learn from what her clients told her of their pain and inner suffering and go beyond her duty to help them.
These are some of the enduring and endearing qualities that linger in my memory of Usha Perera, a remarkable human being whose premature death six months ago has left a void that can never be filled for those who loved her.
Having known her as a child when she accompanied her parents to the Kollupitiya Methodist Church which I too attended, I later got to know her more personally when we began sharing views on subjects which interested us mutually: health issues, women’s equality, child abuse, rape of young women and the trauma that followed, infertility, the environment, education, and nutrition.
When she used to walk into the office of the Nation paper where I worked briefly to hand in some copy on one of her pet subjects to our Features Editor, her cheerful morning greeting of, “Isn’t it a lovely day ?” even when it was pelting rain outside, would ring across the room.
It was that spirit of optimism that she held on to during the many crises she encountered in life, and which also rubbed off on those who moved with her.
I remember how when attending a Journalism conference on Trauma Counselling in Bangkok with her, I forgot to take my handbag containing my passport , suitcase keys etc, discovering it only when my son who drove me to the airport asked me for the documents. As it was too late to turn back, we turned to Usha for help as she was waiting for us at the entrance. With a calmness that amazed me, she simply dug into her bag and produced copies she had earlier made and got us through, telling me “Don’t worry Carol about the suitcase keys, we’ll manage when we get to Bangkok.”
On the first day of our arrival she decided to go shopping before the conference started and as we walked talking nineteen to the dozen, I suddenly slipped on a broken tile and fell face down on the pavement. With her help I managed to sit on the pavement and as the market was nearby we went inside to do our purchasing. I recall how carefully Usha chose dresses and shoes to match for her two little daughters who she would fervently pray for every day.
When we returned home after the hospital where I was taken after my fall diagnosed me with three cracked ribs, I was so grateful to Usha for helping me to pack and carry my suitcase downstairs and make sure we had comfortable seats on the flight home.
Though you left for a while to
Canada and returned with more qualifications, you always kept in touch with your friends and I recall how nostalgic you were about Sri Lanka. You never complained about any illness except the occasional migraine headaches for which you just treated yourself with a paracetamol. So you can imagine what a terrible shock it was for all of us to hear of your sudden passing away leaving a void that can never be filled especially for your lovely twin daughters you doted on, and your loving husband.
May God bless your soul and may you have eternal rest with your Maker in whom your faith never wavered no matter what crisis you faced.