Was it planned? It’s part of a plan bigger than you understand
DEAR ANNIE: You printed a letter from “Expecting Mom in the Midwest,” who asked for a response when rude people ask, “Was it planned?” You suggested, “Why do you need to know?” I think a good answer would be, “Of course! God planned it!” I love your column.
— Bossier City, Louisianna
Dear Bossier City: Your response was by far the most popular one we received. We appreciate all who sent in their personal preferences. Here are a few samples:
From Pat: Your response was masterful. Another retort (not original to me) would be: “If people ask you, tell them you don’t know.” And a gentler response: “I’m hurt by your question.”
El Paso: In my opinion, a better answer to this question is: “Well, I guess that’s really between my husband and me. Don’t you agree?”
R.: I would simply say, “Yes, it was planned, but if we plan another, should we inform you first?” There seem to be more ignorant and stupid people in today’s world, and they have no filters between their brains and mouths.
P.: When asked, “Was this pregnancy planned,” I would say, “I give up. Was it?” I have used this more times than I can say, and it always works.
Mother of Twins: I would simply ask, “Were you?”
Tyler, Texas: Someone could reply, “It was more planned than the question you just asked!”
Salisbury, Pennsylvania: I’ve found this response works: “Why in the world would you ask such a personal question? It’s rude, and you’re normally not a rude person. Are you feeling OK?” Whenever you end with a question, the other person feels compelled to answer. So throw it back in their court, and watch ’ em squirm. They deserve a little squirming.