He’s too con­trol­ling

Belfast Telegraph - Weekend - - WEEKEND TV -

At first my fu­ture son-in-law seemed like a lovely man. How­ever, since my daugh­ter moved in with him, he’s turned into a mon­ster.

He is in­cred­i­bly jeal­ous and in­sists on know­ing where she is at ev­ery mo­ment of the day. My daugh­ter is re­ally up­set and has be­come so fright­ened of do­ing any­thing that she rarely goes out un­less he is with her.

I’m re­ally wor­ried, but when I sug­gest she leaves him, she says she still loves him. GN FIONA SAYS: TREAD CARE­FULLY You are right to be con­cerned be­cause this type of jeal­ous, posses­sive be­hav­iour is of­ten in­grained and hard to change, and it can also lead to vi­o­lence. How­ever, you need to be cau­tious.

If you ap­ply too much pres­sure on your daugh­ter, you risk push­ing her even fur­ther away. As she still loves him, it would be bet­ter to let them work to­wards their own so­lu­tion, be­cause it’s pos­si­ble he’s just re­ally in­se­cure.

Let her know you love her and are there for her, then make sure she knows where to go for help if she needs it. I am 45 and dur­ing a hol­i­day in Cyprus re­cently I met a man. We had a great time to­gether. I was de­lighted when he of­fered me his email ad­dress and sug­gested we get in touch. A week af­ter get­ting back he dropped me an email to say he had a great time and I replied, sug­gest­ing we meet up. That was two days ago and I have heard noth­ing. Should I email him again? LF FIONA SAYS: DON’T JUMP TO CON­CLU­SIONS It is pos­si­ble he is only an oc­ca­sional user of his email ac­count and hasn’t read your re­ply. So wait for a few more days. If you have still heard noth­ing, send him another. If this goes unan­swered, I think you may have to ac­cept this was in­deed just a hol­i­day ro­mance.

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