Can­celling com­edy hour

Country Life Every Week - - Marriage Counselling -

My best friend will be hurt if I don’t pick him to be my best man, but I don’t trust him at all to make a suit­able speech—what should I do? Of late, the best man’s speech has taken on the tone of a late-night lads’ quiz on Dave—it’s thor­oughly re­gret­table. The best man’s job ti­tle is as fol­lows: Stal­wart Main­stay, Moral Guardian, Valet de Cham­bre, Ring-bearer (if one must use that aw­ful Amer­i­can term) and Per­sonal Body­guard, but not Am­a­teur Post-wa­ter­shed StandUp Co­me­dian.

Hold your stag-week­end at the Ed­in­burgh Fes­ti­val, which will curb his am­bi­tion or per­haps re­fine his tim­ing, ei­ther of which might help. Place a de­fib­ril­la­tor con­spic­u­ously on the ta­ble in front of the bride’s fa­ther and have the Ma­tron of Hon­our stand­ing by with a shep­herd’s crook, ready to haul him off like a dy­ing vaudevil­lian. Fi­nally, ask the DJ to cue up some­thing lovely—say, Bar­ber’s Ada­gio for Strings—to drown him out at the first faint whiff of 8 Out of 10 Cats.

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from UK

© PressReader. All rights reserved.